Requires Adult Supervision

| Philadelphia, PA, USA | Bizarre, Theme Of The Month

(I work in a daycare which caters to infants through to 12 years of age. A middle-aged man once approaches me.)

Customer: “Hi.”

Me: “Hello. How can I help you?”

Customer: “I want to be cared for.”

Me: “How old are you?”

Customer: “46.”

Me: “This is a daycare that only caters to young children.”

Customer: “Oh… do you know where I can find a daycare that caters to adults?”

Me: “Yes I do. The nearest hospital is right down the road.”

Customer: “Thanks! I can’t wait to play with the toys!”

H2-D’oh!

| NE, USA | Extra Stupid, Home Improvement

Me: “[Lawn Care], how can I help you?”

Caller: “Yes, you seeded my backyard for me this spring.”

Me: “Yes, is everything okay?”

Caller: “Well, it isn’t coming up very well. Some of it is, but not very much.”

Me: “I see, and how often are you watering?”

Caller: “Excuse me?”

Me: “How often are you watering your lawn?”

Caller: “Oh, I’m not. Should I be? Will that help?”

Raisin Awareness Of Her Problem

| MI, USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink, Health & Body, Theme Of The Month

(I give out free samples. I am serving a variety of grapes when I see a well-dressed woman in her 60s nearby with her daughter and grandchild. Listening to them talk, she seems very educated and well-spoken, and I see her approach my cart.)

Me: “Hello, would you like to try some of our grapes today?”

Customer: “Oh, no thank you, dear.”

(I wish her a good day, and go back to preparing more samples. I realize a few seconds later that she is still just standing there, staring at me.)

Me: “Is there anything I can help you with, ma’am?”

(Suddenly she gives me a death glare, jabs her finger toward my bowl of grapes and yells at me.)

Customer: “DEY GIVE ME DA POOPIES!”

(She then stomps off in a huff, leaving me to wonder what the heck just happened.)