Man banned from all Walmarts for life

| Right | December 31, 2013

Good Morning America’ reports an Arizona man is now banned for life from Walmarts worldwide. Joe Cantrell said he was trying to get a price matched at the store, and an associate told him it wasn’t allowed. He complained to management and left. When he returned a few days later, Cantrell was handcuffed and charged with threatening, intimidation and disorderly conduct. KTAR reports that a Walmart spokesman said the associate felt threatened.

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Customer Engagement At An All Time High

| Right | December 31, 2013

Not Shopping Black Friday

| Right | December 31, 2013

blackfriday

It’s Beginning To Smell A Lot Like Christmas

| USA | Right | December 31, 2013

(It’s three days before Christmas. A teenage girl is dragging her boyfriend around the store making him smell everything. She’s obviously stressed out by last minute holiday shopping.)

Girl: “Um… I need… um… Here! Smell this. Is is good for [Name]?”

Boyfriend: “Babe, I’m not picking out what your friends smell like. They’re all minors. That’s creepy.”

Girl: “Please? Most of them are 18 now.”

Boyfriend: *sighs and sniffs* “Smells great.”

Girl: “Okay. And now, for my sister. This one?”

Boyfriend: “Come on, hun. Just pick out whatever and let’s get you something to eat.”

Girl: “I have to smell these people!”

Boyfriend: “You do this every year, babe. Why didn’t you start shopping two weeks ago?”

Girl: “Because I’m a procrastinator! It took me two years to realize you liked me!”

(The boyfriend looks a little intimidated so I step in and help the girl pick out gifts for the other six people on her list. They leave, the girl still stressing over other presents.)

Me: “Thank you for coming!”

Girl: “You too! Wait… Shoot. I mean happy holidays?”

Boyfriend: “Sorry. We’re going to go get her some sugar now.”

(The boyfriend comes back the next day to pick out a gift for his girlfriend and specifically requests me. I get a $20 tip and the humorous details of the rest of his shopping experience from the previous day!)

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The Argument Crumbles Like A Cookie

| Stockholm, Sweden | Right | December 31, 2013

(It is early November.)

Customer: “Do you have any gingerbread cookies?”

Me: “Sorry, ma’am. We don’t.”

Customer: “Why would you not even have gingerbread cookies?”

Me: “Sorry, but we haven’t even started making them yet this year.”

Customer: “What? Why the f*** not?”

Me: “Because here at [Shop’s Name], we like to follow the traditions and not start baking Christmas cookies until Christmas time.”

Customer: “Ah, I see! I’m glad to hear that you follow the traditions. All shops should be like you. I don’t get it why people just can’t wait these days. Everyone is just so d*** greedy!” *wanders off*

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