A Triple Rainbow Of Pens

| NY, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre

(I work part time at the local convenience store that sells school supplies, snacks, basic clothing, and other things. A customer walks in smelling heavily of marijuana.)

Customer: “Can I get some pens?”

Me: “Umm, sure.”

(I show the customer over to the area where we keep pens and pencils.)

Customer: “Whoa… YOU GUYS HAVE PINK PENS?!”

Me: “Yes, why?”

Customer: “I didn’t know they made pink pens!”

Me: “Umm… they make pens in every color, sir.”

Customer: “Even… ORANGE?!”

Me: “Yes, even orange.”

Customer: “Even YELLOW?! Oh wait, that’d just be a highlighter.”

Me: *points at yellow gel pens* “No, they make yellow pens too.”

Customer: “WOW!”

(The customer buys his pens and leaves. Good to know I may have changed someone’s life.)

It’s Only A Paper Cup

| Canada | Bizarre

(A customer walks up to my till and orders a coffee.)

Me: “Alright, that’ll be $1.65. Is that for here or to go?”

Customer: “For here. Why did you ask me that?”

Me: “If it’s for here, we put it in a mug. If it’s to go, we put it in a paper cup.”

Customer: “Paper?”

Me: “Yep! A paper cup.”

Customer: “Paaaaper?”

Me: “Um, yes, is that what you’d prefer?”

Customer: “Paaaaaaper?”

Me: *thinking he might not know the difference* “Yes, see, here’s a paper cup, and here’s a mug.”

Customer: “Paaaaaaaaper?”

Me: “Paper cup it is!”

(I make him his drink and hand it to him. He stares at it, hands me the money, and nods.)

Customer: “Paaaaaaper!”

Doesn’t Know Rudimentary Rudeness

| Boston, MA, USA | At The Checkout, Wild & Unruly

(I come in several times a week, and most of the cashiers recognize me. Since I work retail myself, I’m always extra-careful to use ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ when I order. One cold day, I pop in for a cup of coffee on my way to work.)

Me: “Hi, may I please have a medium caramel latte?”

Cashier: “Skim milk, right?”

Me: “Yes please!”

(There is another customer behind me; I can hear her talking but am tuned out since I don’t know her, and I assume she’s on the phone. Suddenly she grabs the sleeve of my coat and yanks, pulling me off-balance so I have to catch myself on the counter.)

Customer: “HEY! I’m talking to you!”

Me: *totally rattled* “Don’t touch me. What do you want?”

Customer: “I was going to say I like your coat, you stupid b****, but you’re the rudest thing ever, ignoring me!”

(I am flabbergasted, but then the cashier jumps in.)

Cashier: “She not rude, you’re rude! Don’t touch people! You need to leave now!”

(The woman starts ranting and raving and we all just stare at her until she leaves.)

Me: “That was awesome!” *leaves a big tip* “Thanks, see you tomorrow!”