They Got Owned

| Greenwich, CT, USA | At The Checkout, Liars & Scammers, Top

(I work in a very affluent part of town at a very well-known clothing store. The owners are known around town and come into the store very often. We get a lot of wealthy and prominent customers who are used to getting what they want, no matter what. Because of this, we try do everything we can to satisfy them the best we can.)

Me: “Hello there, can I help you with anything today?”

Customer: “Yes, I am looking for [item], and I need it in this size.”

Me: “Okay! Let me go check for you. I’ll be back in a moment.”

(Meanwhile, one of the owners walks in and starts talking to my manager.)

Me: “I’m sorry ma’am, we don’t happen to have that item in stock. I can check another store for you if you like, and we can ship it to you free of charge.”

Customer: *screaming* “THAT IS UNACCEPTABLE! I WANT THIS ITEM NOW! I KNOW YOU HAVE IT SOMEWHERE!”

Me: “I am very sorry, ma’am, but we do not have that item. We don’t have it in any sizes. We unfortunately sold out. But I can call a few of our other stores and get it shipped to you.”

Customer: “NOT ACCEPTABLE! I WANT THIS NOW!”

(She sees another customer who is wearing what she wants. This ‘customer’ just happens to be the owner.)

Customer: “This is the item I want. GIVE IT TO ME!”

Other Customer/Owner: *winks at me*

Me: “Ma’am, I’m sorry, but you cannot ask this customer to give you his shorts. I can check another store for you though.”

Customer: “No! I want his shorts!” *turns to the owner* “Give me your shorts! I know the owner personally. He says I can do whatever I want!”

Other Customer/Owner: “Oh, I had know idea that you knew the owner. What’s his name?”

Customer: “Um, his name is Paul! Now give me the shorts!”

(Meanwhile, a few other customers and the manager walk over to see the fuss.)

Other Customer/Owner: “Huh, that’s weird. My name isn’t Paul. Welcome to my store. Now, get out before I press charges.”

Customer: *freezes and runs out of the store*

(I unfortunately didn’t get a raise. I’m only a seasonal employee, but I did end up being able to get a huge discount on clothes for the rest of my life and I even got to pick out a few outfits free of charge!)

1 Thumbs
2,692
VOTES

No Wait To Her Argument

| Columbus, OH, USA | Extra Stupid, Health & Body, Time

(I’m running slightly late to meet a patient. I arrive about five minutes after the appointment time to find no one there. I wait around, wondering if she was perhaps caught up in traffic. After half an hour goes by, I call her.)

Patient: *rudely* “Hello!?”

Me: “Hello, this is [name] of [clinic name]. We had a 4 pm appointment today, but I didn’t see you.”

Patient: “Oh, I was waiting forever, and you never showed!”

Me: “I’m so sorry I missed you. How long were you waiting?”

Patient: “45 minutes.”

Me: “Huh? But it’s 4:30 now and there’s no one here.”

Patient: “Yeah, I know! I left at 4pm!”

Me: “But, that’s when our appointment was.”

Patient: “Right! I can’t believe you were so late!”

Me: “Please correct me if I’m wrong, but [clinic] is by-appointment-only, which means I am not in the office unless there’s a patient. I’ve told you this, haven’t I?”

Patient: “That’s right.”

Me: “So you’re upset because I wasn’t here 45 minutes before I was actually supposed to be here?”

Patient: “Yes!”

(The weirdest thing is that I had actually treated her before, and she’d shown up fifteen minutes late without calling!)

Acting Acidic

| South West England, UK | Bizarre, Food & Drink

(In addition to salt and vinegar, my chip shop offers customers slices of lemon with their fish.)

Me: “Would you like lemon with your fish, sir?”

Customer: *screaming* “DON’T YOU EVER ASK ME IF I WANT LEMON AGAIN! NEVER PUT LEMON ON MY ORDER!”

Not Much Of An Enabler

| Kansas, USA | Bigotry, Crazy Requests, Top

(My college has a free laser tag game set up in the courtyard by a local group. One of the players, a boy I know fairly well, is knock-kneed to the point of it being a minor disability, and slowing his steps tremendously. He is a good shot, however, and wishes to play. We have about three rounds when a woman storms up to the two men running the event as we all re-load.)

Woman: “Why are you letting them pick on this poor boy?”

Employee #1: “Pick on… who?” *looks at group, confused*

Woman: *points at the knock-kneed boy* “Him!”

Me: “We’re picking on you?”

Boy: “No, don’t think so. I’m having fun!”

Woman: “How can you have fun? They can all run around, and you can’t! You have to hold still!”

Boy: “A lot of people hold still, there are the forts to hang onto.”

Girl: “And thanks for reminding him about the disability, lady.”

Employee #2: “Ma’am, I assure you [company] does not allow bullying in its games.”

Woman: “You can’t let disabled people play sports! They feel discriminated against!”

Employee #1: “So, in order not to discriminate against this boy by letting him play, we should discriminate against him by not letting him play?”

Woman: “I’m reporting this!” *storms off to the help desk*

(She found out that the help desk was student run, and the boy running it was the knock-kneed boy’s former roommate. She was laughed out!)

1 Thumbs
2,779
VOTES

Getting A Kick Out Of Tourists

| Australia | Food & Drink, Pets & Animals, Tourists/Travel

(I am working as a waitress in the middle of a city in Australia. We have a large outdoor dining area.)

Customer: *in an American accent* “Excuse me, Miss. I’d like to be moved.”

Me: “As we’re really busy, I’m not sure if we have any spare tables. Is it too hot out here for you?”

Customer: “No, I just don’t want to get my food stolen.”

Me: “By… who? Is someone stealing food?”

Customer: “By the kangaroos! I haven’t seen any today, though. I’ve heard they like to kick you and steal your food.”

Customer’s Australian Friend: “Dude, I was kidding.”

Customer: *shocked* “Oh my God, really?”

1 Thumbs
2,251
VOTES
Page 1,705/3,127First...1,7031,7041,7051,7061,707...Last