Episode 94: The Poser Menace

| Greenville, SC, USA | Geeks Rule

(I work at a video rental store and near our check out we have the boxed set of Star Wars on Blu-ray.)

Customer: “Oh my God, Star Wars on Blu-ray! I love this movie so much!  I like how in the new ones, they put in the new Anakin Skywalker in the scene with the Jabberwockys on Earth!”

Me: “…you mean Ewoks on Endor?”

Customer: “Oh yeah, that’s what they’re called…”

Embarrassingly Empathic

| Idaho Falls, ID, USA | Uncategorized

(I have a picture of my husband, daughter, and myself posted at my window. It is the picture we used for our wedding announcements. Customers often comment on what a nice picture it is. Recently I cut my hair several inches shorter.)

Customer: *looking at the picture* “You have a very nice family.”

Me: “Thank you.”

Customer: “You look different in the picture.”

Me: “I recently cut my hair.”

Customer: “It’s okay. You look younger in person.”

Me: “Thank you?”

Customer: “And don’t worry; I take bad pictures too!”

Me: *speechless*

Intelligence Doesn’t Quite Measure Up

| Massachusetts, USA | Math & Science

(Two coworkers and I are sitting around when a woman who appears to be approaching 60 years of age walks in. My newer coworker takes her order.)

Coworker: “Hello, how may I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, hi…I was wondering, how long is a footlong?”

(We all think she’s joking.)

Coworker: *holds hands up about a foot apart*

Customer: *still confused* “Hmm…okay…uh, can I see one?”

Try Our New De Caf Bonne Nuit Blend

| UK | Food & Drink, Health & Body

Customer: *angrily* “Get your manager. I have a complaint!”

Me: “Of course, sir. Just a moment, please.”

(I get the manager.)

Manager: “Can I help you, sir?”

Customer: *still angry* “Yesterday evening, I ordered six cups of coffee to go because I had work to do, but I fell asleep after an hour! My work is ruined! I’m going to sue your a**!”

Manager: “What flavor did you order?”

Customer: *thinks for a moment* “A french flavor…de Caf!”

Two And A Half Customers

| San Jose, CA, USA | Family & Kids, Liars & Scammers

(Our salon requires a credit card hold for parties of three or more to discourage last-minute cancellations. It doesn’t matter how old the customers are. Whether they are 3-year-olds or 80-year-olds, we still reserve a spot for them regardless. We have a lot of customers who try to get around the credit card rule.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [salon], how can I help you?”

Caller: “Hi, I wanted to make appointments for two people today.”

Me: “Sure, what kind of services would you like?”

Caller: “Two pedicures.”

(I book the appointments, confirm with the caller, and am about to end the call.)

Caller: “I also wanted to bring my daughter in for a kid’s pedi.”

Me: “Oh okay, so you’re actually booking for three people?”

Caller: *sounding annoyed* “Does she even count? She’s just a kid.”

Me: “Yes, she does. She’s still a person.”

Caller: “That’s ridiculous!”

Page 1,700/2,940First...1,6981,6991,7001,7011,702...Last