PEBCAK & Episode V

| Vancouver Island, BC, Canada | Technology

(Note: I provide desktop support for a division of the Canadian government.)

Caller: “My computer is frozen. I’ve tried everything and it just doesn’t respond…” *describes what’s on the screen*

Me: “Okay, we can fix that.”

(A bit of troubleshooting transpires.)

Caller: “No, it’s still not doing anything.”

Me: “Okay, we will try a hard power off. Hold down the power button on the tower until the computer turns off, and then press it again to turn it back on.”

(The caller answers almost immediately, which is a tad fast as it takes about 5 seconds for the tower to power off usually.)

Caller: “Okay, I did that. It’s still the same.”

Me: “What do you mean it’s still the same?”

Caller: “Nothing has changed. It’s just like it was before I turned it off. I know what I’m doing; I’m good with computers. I use one at home all the time, too.”

Me: “…So, you completely turned the computer off by holding down the power button and when you turned it back on you didn’t have to log on or enter a password, and all your applications showed up still frozen?”

Caller: “Yes, that’s it exactly. I don’t understand what’s going on! I’m good with computers. I use one at home all the time, too.”

(I ask a couple more questions before giving up fixing it over the phone. As she works in the same building as I do, I tell her that I’ll be up to see her in a few minutes. I walk in to see her holding down the power button and a blank screen.)

Caller: “I thought that if I held it down for longer it might be better.”

Me: *bites tongue* “Okay, well what we need to do—”

Caller: “See?!” *the screen lights up* “Exactly the same as before I shut it all down!”

Me: “Okay, but that is the monitor. We need to shut down the computer…”

Related:
PEBCAK & Episode IV

Happy Spanksgiving

| Tampa, FL, USA | Holidays, Pets & Animals, Rude & Risque, Theme Of The Month

(I am at the airport heading home for Thanksgiving. As I put my laptop back in my bag after security, a present for my dog—who stay with my parents while I’m at college—falls out.)

Other Traveler: “Dear, you dropped your handcuffs. Wait. Are handcuffs allowed? Sir!” *signals a TSA agent* “She has handcuffs!”

(The TSA agent walks over and speaks to me, somewhat confused.)

TSA Agent: “Something about handcuffs?”

Me: *holds up the toy: three connected, tightly woven rings*

TSA Agent: “I see.” *to the other traveler* “Miss, those are not handcuffs, and please don’t call us like that; it could cause a panic.”

Woman: “Oh, so handcuffs are allowed?”

Me: “It’s for my dog. It’s a toy.”

Woman: “Oh, such a kinky thing to call your boyfriend! You naughty thing!”

(The agent and I share looks, but I decide to let her have her idea. Next, I take out the scarf I bought my dog to tie around the rings.)

Woman: “…And a gag too? Lord girl, what will your parents think?!”

TSA Agent: “That she’s giving me a better busy Thanksgiving day at work than I thought!”

Locked, Off The Clock, And Blocked

| California, USA | Extra Stupid, Hotels & Lodging

(I’m a night auditor at a hotel. I’m doing some paperwork at 4am when a mildly perturbed customer comes to the front desk. He says that his key isn’t working, so I reprogram it and he leaves. He comes back a few minutes later, fuming, saying that the key is still not working. I decide to go to his room and try it myself, and confirm that it’s not working. I try my master key, but still nothing.)

Me: “I’m sorry about this, sir. I’ll get the maintenance guy up here in a few minutes. He’s off the clock, but lives in the hotel.”

Guest: “So, what are you going to do to fix this? Are you going to comp my room? Do you just want to give me some blankets and pillows so I can sleep on the f***ing floor?!”

Me: “Like I said, sir, the maintenance guy is on his way. If this is our fault, we can gladly give you a discount pending manager approval.”

Guest: “See that you do! This is f***ing ridiculous!”

(I return to the front desk, and the maintenance guy comes to pick up his tools. He starts to walk towards the room when the customer bursts in.)

Guest: “I demand to see a manager!”

Me: “Sorry, but the manager isn’t in right now.”

Guest: “Then give me your name!” *snaps his fingers at the maintenance guy* “And you, hurry your a** up! Freaking ridiculous!”

(10 minutes later, the poor maintenance guy comes back to the front desk.)

Me: “How’d it go?”

Maintenance Guy: “You were right; he was an a**hole.”

Me: “I told you. What happened with the door? Did you get it open?”

Maintenance Guy: “You’re not going to believe this. I start to jimmy the door open, and the noise woke the guy’s grandma, who was sleeping inside, and had hard-locked the door. She opened the door, I flipped the lock, and the key worked perfectly.”

Me: “Wow. Did he say anything?”

Maintenance Guy: “He still wanted a full refund!”

Gamers Have To Band Together

| NJ, USA | Awesome Customers, Family & Kids, Geeks Rule, Musical Mayhem, Top

(A demo for Rock Band has been set up at the electronics store I work at. I hang around the game section to answer questions and help out. I see two kids, about 8 or 9, who are playing the guitars on easy, while a very pregnant lady is playing drums. I assume they’re all together until another woman storms up.)

Woman: *to the boys* “I told you not to play these games! They’re bad for you!” *turns to the pregnant lady* “You’re setting a bad example! Don’t you know how horrible video games are for kids?! Your poor child!”

Pregnant Lady: *smiling, but not stopping* “Actually, music proficiency is linked to having advantages in math and study skills and video games, and when used correctly can instill time management and problem solving skills.” *does a difficult drum riff* “If my ‘poor child’ does half as well as his gamer parents, he’ll have at least two degrees, and a successful medical career.”

(The pregnant lady finishes the song, scores 90% on expert, and gets up. She smiles and leaves the demo. I held up my fist on the way out and she fist-bumped me. The other woman couldn’t pull her two kids away fast enough.)

1 Thumbs
4,151
VOTES

Weekly Roundup: Animals!

Not Always Right | Pets & Animals, Roundups

Animals! This week, we feature five stories with customers involving animals!

  1. When Stupid People Attack (4,941 Thumbs Up)
    Nothing can go wrong when a bored zoo visitor asks to poke a thousand-pound bear with a stick. Nothing at all!
  2. Hiss-terical Contest (3,892 Thumbs Up)
    If you’re gonna challenge an animal to a staring contest, it’s best to make sure they have eyelids first.
  3. Goldilocks Is Better Off With The Bears (2,642 Thumbs Up)
    These camping parents’ understanding of childcare is nearly un-bear-able!
  4. Suffering From A Reptile Dysfunction (1,641 Thumbs Up)
    “There be dragons” is taken at face value by this conservatory visitor.
  5. Customer’s A Real Dodo (2,501 Thumbs Up)
    Some pet store customers can be dodo-heads when it comes to extinct creatures!

PS #1: check out our new Extras section, with pictures, videos, and news galore!

PS #2: Read more roundups here!

Page 1,656/3,119First...1,6541,6551,6561,6571,658...Last