Less Scam Artists, More Scam Finger-Painters

| CT, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Liars & Scammers, Money, Theme Of The Month

(I work in a small specialty retail shop. It is the beginning of the day, so we only have $70 in each of the two cash registers, mostly change with a handful of $5 and $1 bills. Two customers come in and browse around, getting only a few small items each. They are the first customers of the day on my register. The first one gives me a $20 bill for a $4.79 purchase. I put the bill on top of the drawer, and count the change back to her.)

Customer: “You’re giving me the wrong change. I gave you a $50 bill.”

(I haven’t closed the register, and am just putting the $20 in its slot, so I show the customer the bill.)

Me: “No, you gave me a $20 bill, right here.”

Customer: “No, I know I gave you a $50 bill.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but it was a $20 bill. You’re my first customer, and this is the only $20 bill, and there are no $50 bills at all.”

Customer: “You must have put it into the safe slot.”

Me: “We don’t have one of those. Here, have a look.”

(I pull the drawer out, and show the customer the contents and the space underneath it.)

Me: “There’s no $50 bill anywhere. And no other bills over $5.”

(The customer’s friend decides to intervene.)

Customer’s Friend: “Don’t worry; it’s okay.”

(They exchange looks, and the first customer rolls her eyes.)

Customer: “Okay then, well, no point in making a scene about it.”

Me: “Thank you.”

(I check out the friend’s small purchase, who gives me a $50 bill. I give her the change and they both turn to leave. On the way out, the friend whispers to the first customer…)

Customer’s Friend: “You were supposed to let me check out first!”

Enough To Get The Blood Pumping

| QLD, Australia | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Health & Body

(I’m working on the checkouts when a customer around her 30s approaches with a large trolley.)

Me: “Hi, how are you?”

Customer: “Fine.”

(She starts loading her groceries onto the register and I start scanning. She then reaches into her bag to take something out. Not paying much attention, I continue scanning. The register belt moves closer to me and soon I see that she has placed a used sanitary pad on the register.)

Me: “Uh… ma’am? Is that from you?”

Customer: “Yes, why?”

Me: “Would you mind removing it from my register?”

Customer: “Why? Are you too lazy to throw it out yourself?”

Me: “Ma’am, that is a serious health hazard. Besides that, it isn’t in my job description to clean up after customers. I’m not touching that; please get it off my register.”

Customer: “I can’t believe how lazy you are!”

(The customer grabs the pad, storms over to the bin and throws it away before coming back to pay for her groceries. She leaves without a word. I close down my register, and wash my hands a dozen times.)

Two Wings Don’t Make Them Right

, | Omaha, NE, USA | Food & Drink, Liars & Scammers, Theme Of The Month

(I’m working at a restaurant that sells fried chicken. A customer approaches me after she has eaten her entire meal. The tray she’s carrying only has picked-clean chicken bones on it.)

Me: “How can I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, I ordered the white meat chicken meal, but got dark meat pieces instead. You need to give me a new meal.”

Me: “I’m sorry for the confusion, but the white meat chicken meal comes with a breast and wing, which is what you received.”

Customer: “No, you gave me a leg and a thigh. I paid extra for the white meat meal and I demand that you give me a replacement!”

Me: “Again, I’m sorry for the confusion, but as you can see by the chicken bones on your tray, this piece was a breast piece. See the rib bones here, and this piece was a wing.”

Customer: “Get me your manager NOW!”

(My manager has heard the interchange and cordially comes over.)

Manager: “I’m terribly sorry for the mistake, ma’am; here’s a replacement meal for you.”

(My manager hands her another white meat meal.)

Customer: “It’s about time!”

(After the customer leaves, having left the tray with the chicken bones on it, I turn to my manager.)

Me: “Why did she get a free replacement meal when it’s obvious that she got and completely ate what she ordered?”

Manager: *smiling sadly* “The customer always thinks they’re right, even when they’re wrong. And especially when all they want is to throw a fit for free food. I’ve learned it’s easier to just give them what they want than to try to convince them to be decent people.”

Me: “The customer is always right?”

Manager: “Even when they’re wrong!”