Wined And Dined And Fined

| Right | February 8, 2014

Towering Ignorance

| NY, USA | Right | February 7, 2014

(I work in tech support for cell phones. A coworker is having a conversation with a customer whose phone isn’t working.)

Agent: “Okay! Have you tried checking out the settings on your phone? You may have turned those services off.”

Customer: “No, I didn’t. Definitely didn’t do that.”

Agent: “Hmm, I see! Well, you could always give our customer service department a quick call to see if something is up! How’s that sound?”

Customer: “I’m at my cousin’s house and the elevation is very high so I made sure to turn ‘airplane mode’ on. It’s pissing me off that this isn’t working.”

Agent: “Oh! Airplane mode is actually going to disable your phone from using those features. Take that off for me, please, and try again.”

Customer: “Wow! Do you think I’m going to be fooled like that? You’re lying. How do people talk to each other on airplanes? DUH! Sucks when I know more than an employee…”

Agent: “I’m not entirely sure what you mean. Could you elaborate, please? ”

Customer: “Uhm, wow. I can’t believe I’m doing this: Airplane mode is for when you need to call someone while up high in the air to connect to satellites and stuff rather than towers. How do you think pilots and astronauts contact ground control? You’re a complete idiot. Goodbye.”

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Freedom Isn’t Free

| OH, USA | Right | February 7, 2014

(I work at a wholesale club and every few months we give out free 90 day trials in lieu of paying for a membership. I have just finished explaining our offer to a customer.)

Me: “So, did you want to try our paid membership or just get the 90 day free trial?”

Customer: “I have a question.”

Me: “Okay. What’s your question?”

Customer: “This is completely free?”

Me: “Yep.”

Customer: “So, you mean to tell me that for 90 days I can come in here, and get anything I want for free?”

(I pause and look at them for a second, and I ask her to repeat her question, which she does.)

Me: “Ma’am, only the membership is free. You still have to pay for the items.”

Customer: “Well, that is just false advertising. You all shouldn’t say something is free if you still have to pay for it.

(She stormed off and I sat there wondering what just happened.)

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Deaf To Reason, Part 2

, | Darwin, NT, Australia | Right | February 7, 2014

(I am at a supermarket checkout.)

Me: “Hey, there! How are you this eveni—”

Customer: “You realise there’s a man in here with a dog, right?”

Me: “Oh? Maybe it’s a guide dog or something?”

Customer: “No, no! It doesn’t have the guide dog harness! Really! The beast is sticking its nose in the fresh bread!”

(She proceeds to point over my shoulder, and I decide to look. To my amusement, it is a man who had come to my primary school when I was younger, to teach us about dogs that help people with hearing issues.)

Me: “Actually, I know that guy. The dog is actually there to help him because of his hearing being—”

Customer: “I don’t CARE what the dog is there for! It’s not a guide dog and needs to be removed! If you’re not going to help, call your manager, please!”

(Exasperated and a bit peeved at the customer’s behaviour, I grudgingly do so while she defiantly hold up the line.)

Manager: “What seems to be the problem?”

Customer: “That MAN over there has brought some flea-ridden dog in here while he’s shopping! Get him out of here at once!”

Me: “I tried to explain to her it’s a hearing aid dog, but she’s not listening.”

Customer: “I was listening you little cretin! Hearing aid dogs don’t—”

Manager: “Actually they do, and this man is well known for coming through with his dog to help with his shopping. The kids love him, we love him, and you just appear to want to deny that for sake of argument.”

Customer: “How DARE you! I’m a paying customer!”

(By this point my manager asked her to pay her due and leave. She does… only to come back in and flat out abuse the guy for making HER look like a fool. Cops had to be called for her to be removed.)

Related:
Deaf To Reason

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Nothing Worth Mentioning

| Whitehorse, YT, Canada | Right | February 7, 2014

(A man brings his minivan in to our shop for a suspected power steering leak. He is not sure exactly what’s leaking, but he saw a lot of red fluid underneath his car. After the mechanic finds the leak I call the customer.)

Me: “We found that one of the hoses was starting to crack at a bend. The dealer is the only one that has this part available in town. The part is $185, the labour for replacing the hose is rated at an hour which is $110, the diagnosis time is $49, taxes etc. will bring the total repair to $368.00.”

Customer: “I understand the part and the labour costs, but I don’t necessarily see the need for a diagnosis. Couldn’t you have found out what was leaking without diagnosing it? That’s $50 for nothing, really.”

Me: “Well… we could replace all the power steering parts for about $2500, or we could find out exactly what is leaking and just fix that. What would you prefer?”

(He opted for the $368.00 repair that included a ‘$50 for nothing, really’ diagnosis.)

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