Needs To Clean Up Their Act

| FL, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Health & Body

Customer: “Can you come around to the front of the case so I can show you which steaks I want?”

(I could have gotten the steaks perfectly easily from behind the case, but I do as the customer asks. I put on my plastic gloves and open up the case from the front.)

Customer: *reaching into the case with his bare hand* “I want this one right here and—”

Me: *quickly putting my hand over the steak* “Sir, please don’t touch the steaks with your bare hands.”

Customer: “I just want to feel the texture of them.”

Me: “Texture? Sir, it’s meat.”

Customer: “I mean I want to make sure it’s not all hard, like it’s been sitting out all day.”

Me: “I can assure you these steaks were cut less than an hour ago and have been in our refrigerated case ever since then, sir. But if I let you touch them in there, that would be a health hazard.”

Customer: *suddenly furious* “What do you mean, a health hazard?! My hands are clean! What do you think I am, some kind of slob sicko?!”

(I can tell him several reasons why I can’t let him touch the steaks, no matter how clean he thinks his hands are. But I have a different idea.)

Me: “I’m sure your hands are clean, sir. But let me ask you this. If the person in line ahead of you wanted to put their hands all over the steaks, would you want to buy one then?”

Customer: “Ugh! No!”

Me: “Well, there you go. That’s why I can’t let you do it either.”

Customer: “But my hands are clean! My hands are CLEAN!”

No Returns And No Understanding

| Sydney, NSW, Australia | Crazy Requests, Theme Of The Month

(I usually work the floor and I happen to overhear a conversation as I am near the refunds counter.)

Customer: “Hello. I’d like to return some clothes I’ve bought.”

Cashier: “Sure. Do you have the receipt?”

Customer: “Yep, I’ve got it right here.”

(The customer then puts on the counter a bag from a different store and pulls out a receipt from said store.)

Cashier: “Oh, sorry. I can’t return those. They weren’t bought from here.”

Customer: “But I have the receipt for them. If I have a receipt, I can return what I’ve bought.”

Cashier: “You can only return items to the store you purchased them from. These are from [Other Store], not here.”

Customer: “I don’t understand. I have a receipt. Why won’t you give me a refund?!”

Cashier: “Because they weren’t purchase from here.”

Customer: “But I have the receipt. I did buy them!”

Cashier: “You didn’t buy them from [Our Store Chain]. You bought them from [Other Store]. To get a refund you need to take it back to one of their stores.”

Customer: “But why? If I have a receipt I can return it anywhere.”

Cashier: “I can’t give you the refund because we never received the money . You didn’t buy the items from here, which therefore means we can’t resell the items, since we don’t stock them.”

Customer: “Yes, but [Other Store] is so far away. I don’t have time to go there. I have my receipt. Please give me my money back.”

Cashier: “We never received your money in the first place.”

Customer: “So I’m not getting a refund?”

Cashier: “Not from here I’m afraid.”

(The customer begins to walk away, mumbling.)

Not Quite The Picture Perfect Finish

| Orem, UT, USA | Crazy Requests, Family & Kids, Wild & Unruly

(Our studio is in a mall. I’m the photographer in a sitting with a young child. The child is throwing a tantrum, crying and screaming, while the mother stands next to me doing nothing.)

Me: “Sometimes when kids won’t cooperate, we suggest taking a break. There’s a candy store right next to us or the toy store is right across the hall.”

Mother: “I don’t want to wait any longer to get these photos done. Just take the photo.”

Me: “We could get you right in when you come back. You wouldn’t have to wait again. Sometimes kids just need a quick distraction to calm down.”

(The kid is currently in full meltdown mode.)

Mother: “Just take the photo so I can purchase a package and go home.”

(Without even looking at the child, I snap a photo. The image comes up on the screen: the child is mid-tantrum, red-faced and screaming. I turn to the mother, deadpan.)

Me: “How’s that?”

Mother: “… The candy store is right next to you?”