Anna Oprahnina

| Los Angeles, CA, USA | Bizarre, Books & Reading, Crazy Requests, Movies & TV

(I am a book seller in a large book-store chain. A woman is standing in front of the new release table and is looking frustrated.)

Me: “Can I help you, miss?”

Customer: “I’m looking for a new book. Oprah said it just came out. You should keep more new releases in stock! Especially if it’s a book by Oprah!”

Me: “Okay, well, maybe it’s somewhere else in the store. I can check for you. Do you know the title?”

Customer: “It’s called Anna Karenina.”

Me: *pause* “Oh, that should be in our literature section, under Tolstoy.”

Customer: “Why is it not in the new releases? Oprah said it was just published!”

Me: “Well, actually it was written in the 1870s.”

Customer: “No, it wasn’t! Oprah said it was new! Oprah doesn’t lie! She’s Oprah!”

Me: “Okay. Do you want to get the book?”

Customer: “Of course! Oprah said I have to read it. Oprah!”

(My coworkers spent the rest of the day randomly shouting ‘Oprah!’ over the headsets.)

See this story as a comic!

Not In A Good State To Come In

| Raleigh, NC, USA | Extra Stupid, Geography, Time

(I am working the front desk, and the phone rings. It is about 2:45 in the afternoon.)

Caller: “Hi. I was wondering if [Stylist] has any appointments today.”

Me: “Sorry, we don’t have a stylist by that name here, but I could make you an appointment with someone else. The earliest we can fit you in is 3:15.”

Caller: “Great, I’ll take it.”

(I make the appointment. 3:15 comes, and the girl does not show up. At 3:30 I give her a call back.)

Me: “Hi, [Caller]. Are you still planning to come in?”

Caller: “Yeah, 3:15 right?”

Me: “Yes, but it’s 3:35 now.”

Caller: “No, it’s only 12:35.”

Me: “This is [Salon] in Raleigh, North Carolina.”

Caller: “Oh… I’m in Idaho.”

This Time With Meaning

| ON, Canada | Bizarre, Pets & Animals

(I have on a pair of frog earrings. The face and arms of the frog are in the front, and the legs dangle from the back of the ear.)

Customer: “Oh, those earrings are so cute!”

Me: “Thanks, my boyfriend got them for me.”

Customer: “Oh you must love frogs!”

Me: “No… they’re just fun.”

Customer: “Oh. Well, then, he must love frogs!”

Me: “No, he just thought they were fun.”

Customer: “Well, are you French?”

Me: “Um, well, yeah…”

Customer: “Oh, okay. So that’s why he got them!”