Hard Ballin’

| Malta | Health & Body, Rude & Risque

(I work as a radiographer in the MRI suite. Since the MRI is a powerful magnet, we have to screen patients in case they have any metal implants.)

Me: “Have you had any operations?”

Patient: “Sure. Nothing major. though.”

Me: “Do you have any metal implants?”

Patient: “I should hope not! I was operated on my balls!”

(We looked at each other in silence, with me trying to remain as serious and as professional as possible. Sadly, I failed.)

No Good Day To You

, | TX, USA | Bad Behavior

(I hand out samples of sushi in a grocery store. Sometimes I recognize certain people as the ones that always say no, so I do not even try to ask. Instead, I ask them how they’re doing and try to simply be friendly as they pass by. This is a very common response.)

Me: “Hi! How are you today?”

Customer: “No, thank you.”

Me: “Well, have a good day.”

Customer: “I said no.”

Trying To Avoid A Razor-Sharp Employee

| NY, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Liars & Scammers

(I’m working as a cashier and this sweet-seeming older woman comes up to my counter to buy a razor.)

Me: “Hello, how are you?” *scanning her items as we speak*

Customer: “Wonderful. How are you?”

Me: “I’m doing well, thank you. Your total is $14.”

Customer: “What?! No, that’s five dollars! The bin said it was five dollars!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, this product is $14. Perhaps someone just put it into the $5 bin because they wanted the cheaper item?”

(I get someone to check and the bin is full of a totally different razor set, which I suspected would be the case, especially because this razor was a really nice razor. So we explain this.)

Customer: “This is ridiculous! This is false advertising! You should be sued!”

(She leaves really quickly, while shouting. The associate who was standing there the whole time after checking the bins starts laughing.)

Me: “What?”

Associate: “She tried buying that same razor yesterday with an expired coupon.”