Her Head Is Already In The Clouds

| London, England, UK | Right | July 13, 2015

(I’m a duty manager at a five-star hotel, which is part of an international chain. I’ve just been up to the top floor to let one of our highest tier loyalty program members into her room to find her passport she’d forgotten and we take the lift back down to the lobby together…)

Guest: “So if I’m going to Amsterdam what will they let me take with me?”

Me: “…Flying there?”

Guest: “Yeah! From Gatwick.”

Me: “O… kay… You mean like in your luggage?”

Guest: “Yeah, like, what type of bag?”

Me: “Oh!! Well that usually depends on the airline. Who are you flying with?”

Guest: “Jeanette.”

Me: *blank look*

Guest: “She’s my best friend.”

Me: “No…”

Trying To Take Sides

| CA, USA | Right | July 13, 2015

Me: “Thank you for calling [Hotel]. This is [My Name]. How can I help you?””

Caller: “I wanted to book a room for tonight.”

Me: “We are sold out for tonight.”

Caller: “So there’s nothing available?”

Me: “Yes, we are sold out.”

Caller: “What about the other side?”

Me: “Other side of what?”

Caller: “Are you sold out on the other side of the hotel?”

Me: “Yes, we are sold out… The other side, too.”

Service With Surgical Precision

| USA | Right | July 13, 2015

(I work as technical support at a large company that sells technology into multiple markets. I am following up on a voicemail left by a potential customer. From the voicemail, I know he’s looking for a specific medical product from the company’s medical division. I also know that the rights to the specific product had been sold to another company a few years ago. I dial the number he left me so that I can give him the other company’s contact information.)

Me: “Hello, this is [My Name] from technical support at [My Company]. I’m calling to follow up with a voicemail you left with us earlier today.”

Customer: “Oh, yes, I’m so glad you got back to me!”

Me: “As it turns out, [product he is interested in] is one of the products that [My Company] sold to [Other Company] a few years ago. Would you like to take down their phone number?”

Customer: “Well, actually, I can’t right now. I’m in surgery. It’s what I do for a living. But I’m sure I’ll be able to look up [Other Company]’s phone number if I search on the Internet.”

Me: “Okay, well, I hope you have a good day and that everything turns out well.”

Customer: *cheerfully* “Oh, yes, we’re just closing up the chest now. Thanks again for calling me back!”

In Praise Of Your Baggage

| Edmonton, AB, Canada | Right | July 13, 2015

(I work in a soap company based out of Canada, and business is usually very slow. I don’t get a lot of sleep, so I have bags under my eyes. A female, middle-aged customer walks in.)

Me: “Hello, welcome to [Store]!”

Customer: “Are you wearing eyeliner?”

Me: “No, I’m not. Why do you ask?”

Customer: “It’s just unusual to see men with eyes like yours. Are you sure you don’t wear eyeliner?”

Me: “No, I’m sure those are just bags under my eyes.”

Customer: “Oh… well, they look great!”

Me: “Thank you?”

Genderalising The Problem

| Denver, CO, USA | Right | July 13, 2015

(I work in a plumbing and heating store. I am one of three females on the staff. For clarity, the toilet roughs are the lines that run from the base of toilet to the wall.)

Customer: “I need a new toilet rough for [really popular toilet that we sell].”

Me: “Okay, do you know what size?”

Customer: “11 Inches.”

Me: “Do you mean 12 inches? Those toilet roughs only come in 10, 12, and 14 inches.”

Customer: “No, I mean 11 inches. I asked my plumber and he said that is what it uses.”

Me: “Well, the end of the valve will be in the wall, so it could appear to be only 11 inches. The entire thing, however, would be 12 inches. We have lots of those in stock.”

Customer: “No, it’s eleven inches! God, why do they hire girls to do these jobs?”

Me: “Did your plumber measure the area for the toilet?”

Customer: “No, he just knows what toilet it is, unlike you!”

Me: “Sir, what you want is not made. The rough you want comes in 10, 12, and 14 inches. It won’t be the 10 or 14 inch rough that you need, since you bought the 12 inch. You have the industry standard of 12 inches, like most people. Now, your price for that would be $68.25.”

Customer: “Can I get someone who knows what they are doing now? I don’t want to give you money. I cannot believe a place like this bothered to hire women.”

Me: “Sir, you can go to any plumbing house in this city and they will all tell you that what you want does not exist. I sell this toilet every week. It’s a 12 inch rough.”

Customer: “Give. ME. Someone. Who. Knows. What. They. Are. Talking. About!”

(I call the boss.)

Boss: “What is the problem here?”

Customer: “She doesn’t know her job! I bought this toilet from you and she won’t give me the right rough!”

Boss: “What size rough do you need?”

Customer: “11!”

Boss: “This brand does not make an eleven. It comes in 10, 12, or 14. The one you bought requires a 12 inch rough.”

Customer: *to me* “Why didn’t you tell me that!”

Male Coworker: “She did. Many times. You refused to listen and were too busy being focused on her gender.”

Customer: “I did not! Give me the right valve!”

Boss: “No. Go somewhere else.”

Customer: “But I bought the toilet here!”

Boss: ‘Then what happened to the rough it came with?”

Customer: “I lost it.”

Boss: “Not my problem.”

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