Act Of Misdirection

| Toronto, ON, Canada | Right | July 20, 2015

(I am volunteering and have been assigned to a small cinema for a South African film where the director is appearing. My job is to guard the seats reserved for VIPs.)

Customer: “Listen, do I really have to sit in these seats so far back?”

Me: “Sorry, but these are reserved for VIP personnel only. However, if there are still free seats when the movie starts, then we can see about seating you here.”

Customer: “Look, the director of the film gave me tickets himself!” *folds arms for dramatic effect and looks sternly at me*

Me: “Err… isn’t the director a woman?”

(The customer quickly looks nervous and drains of colour. They scuttle back to their seat quickly.)

WTF Is OFD?

| WI, USA | Right | July 20, 2015

(I work at an ice cream/grill chain store in a small town. I’m training in a new cashier when one of our regulars comes in.)

Regular: “I want my usual.”

Trainee: “I’m sorry?”

Regular: “My usual. You know, with the OFD.”

Trainee: “The what?”

(He repeats the request a couple more times, getting ruder. I decide to intervene and introduce the trainee to our customer.)

Regular: “Oh! You mean you aren’t [Another Coworker]? I want the chicken basket with the OFD.”

(We have half a dozen combos that that could describe, so I ring the order in over the trainee’s shoulder. The customer gets the senior discount and sits in his usual spot without taking a number.)

Trainee: “What’s an OFD?”

Me: “Old fart’s discount.”

Start Over

| Right | July 19, 2015

d3f822657abf4d9b135f4ff6f6eafdf6

A Very Taxing Customer

| GA, USA | Right | July 19, 2015

Cashier: “Okay your total is $8.57.”

Customer: “Whoa, hang on a second; the menu board says the meal is $8.26.”

Cashier: “Yes, the extra is the sales tax.”

Customer: “No, no, that’s bull-s***. You guys are lying on your advertisements. Why don’t you list the real price?”

Me: “Well, sir, the prices are set by corporate. Most businesses don’t include the tax because it varies by location. The tax added in one state is different than another.”

Customer: “Whatever, that is still crap. Here.” *hands over $8.26*

Cashier: “Okay, sir you still owe 31 cents.”

Customer: “No, I just told you I will NOT pay the tax on it.”

Me: “Sir, we cannot complete the transaction until you pay the remainder.”

Customer: “But why should I have to pay more than is listed?”

Me: “The sales taxes are what the state of Georgia says they are. I don’t have control over that.”

Customer: “Whatever.”

(The customer walks off leaving his $8.26 on the counter. We put it to the side and continue with the next customers in line. About 10 minutes later he walks up to the counter again.)

Customer: “Have y’all called my name yet; is my sandwich ready?”

Me: “Sir, we never processed your order.”

Customer: “WHAT? I HAVE BEEN WAITING HERE FOR 10 MINUTES!”

Me: “Sir, you never paid for the order.”

Customer: “Yes, I did! I gave the cashier $8.26!”

Me: “Yes, but as I explained to you, you owed 31 cents and didn’t pay it. Your money is over here if you want it, or if you want to pay the 31 cents we can start your order now.”

Customer: “This is total bull-s***. I am going to be filing a complaint with your store owner AND with corporate. ”

(The customer stormed off without taking his money. I put the money aside and waited for him to come back. By the end of the shift he didn’t show up so I put in the charity collection… ironically, the charity collection that doesn’t have a tax on it.)

It’s Not The Book That’s Bad For Society

| NE, USA | Right | July 19, 2015

(As I’m processing a return, the customer leans forward and begins talking quietly to me.)

Customer: “So, are there books that your store won’t sell?”

Me: *confused* “Well, if the book is rare or very old we sometimes can’t stock them.”

Customer: “No, like, are there books you won’t sell because the government thinks they’re bad for society?”

Me: “Um, I don’t think so…”

Customer: “Do you have a list of the books that you won’t sell? Because the government doesn’t want you to?”

Me: “…No.”

Page 1,001/3,771First...9991,0001,0011,0021,003...Last