Overflowing With Problems

(I’m bagging groceries, and in the middle of an order I notice that the cashier has paused, and is delicately holding up an item she has grabbed out of the shopping cart. She turns to the customer, and the following exchange happens.)

Coworker: “Ma’am, there appears to be something on this. Did you want a new one? Or…”

Customer: “Oh, that, yeah. My daughter had diarrhea, and it overflowed her diaper.”

(At this, my coworker and I take a closer look at the contents of the cart. It’s everywhere. My poor coworker just makes a horrified face, as she realizes she just got a handful of feces.)

Customer: “Yeah, you’re gonna clean that all up, right?”

(We are nowhere near capable of properly cleaning up what turned out to be a few dozen items coated in fecal matter (including a serious need for gloves) at the register, but she was “in a hurry” so we had to clean it up with just paper towels and the glass cleaner we use to wipe down the registers, all the while holding back the urge to vomit. Of course the customer didn’t say another word, but at least my coworker and I got relieved to go sanitize ourselves!)