That Opinion Is Always With Me, Always With You

(My English & Literature teacher for my sophomore year of high school tells us we will have to write a research paper on an American person who had a significant impact on American pop culture. I mishear the time-frame and get to work on it the next week, and turn it in the following week. It isn’t technically assigned for another month, but my strong motivation to do the assignment isn’t what my teacher cares about; she cares about my choice of topic.)

Teacher: *as class is starting* “This is really early. And who is this about? Who is Joe Satriani?”

Me: “He’s a famous guitar player.”

Teacher: “The assignment was that it has to be an American who impacted American pop culture. I don’t think this Joe Santorini guy is famous enough.”

Me: “He’s actually pretty famous. And American.”

Teacher: “What has he done of significance?”

Me: “He was a major name in the rise of ‘virtuoso’ guitar playing from the 80’s, for one.”

Teacher: *to the class* “How many of you have heard of Joe . . .”

Me: “Satriani.”

Teacher: “…Satriani?”

(About two-thirds of the hands go up.)

Teacher: “How can I not have heard of this guy?”

Classmate: “He’s a famous guitar player. He also taught a bunch of other famous guitar players how to play.”

Teacher: “Well, I’ve never heard of him, so you’ll have to pick someone else. Everyone else has to clear their topic with me before starting that paper.”