Opening Times Are An Open Secret

(It’s a weekday during the school year, and the theater opens at 11:00 am. I arrive around 10:30 to clock in and open the box office, and while I wait for a manager to let me in by a side door, I see a customer wander up to the entrance. They look at the open hours sign on the door, but regardless try to open every single door multiple times before approaching me.)

Customer: “What time do you guys open?”

Me: “At 11 o’clock today.”

Customer: “Okay, cool, thanks. You waiting to be let in?”

Me: “Yup! I clock in at 10:30 to open for the day.”

Customer: “Cool. I’ll come in when you go in and buy my tickets.”

Me: “Uh, I’m sorry, sir, but we don’t open until 11 today.”

Customer: “Oh, no, it’s cool. I just need tickets.”

Me: “Okay. We can get you those as soon as we open.”

Customer: “Nah, I’ll just do it now.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but we won’t be open until 11. We can’t sell you tickets before then.”

Customer: “Why not?”

Me: “Because we won’t be open until 11.”

Customer: “But I just need tickets.”

Me: “Right, and we can sell you those when we open.”

Customer: “But I’ll just get them now.”

Me: “We can’t. We’re not open. We need to be able to get ready and open for the day before we can sell tickets.”

Customer: “You won’t let me in before you open? I just need tickets.”

Me: “No, I’m sorry. I can’t let you in before we open.”

Customer: “Why?”

Me: “Because we need to be able to make sure we’re all set before we open for business.”

Customer: “But I just need tickets.”

Me: “I can’t let you in to buy tickets before we open. That defeats the entire purpose of even opening or closing.”

Customer: *confused* “God d*** it! That doesn’t make any sense!”

(He stormed away. It’s shocking how often people think they can come in before we open. And “I just need tickets” is the excuse 90% of the time. Even during the summer or on weekends when we open around 8:00 or 9:00 am at the latest, people still want in 30, 60, 90 minutes, or more before we open. What’s so hard to understand about opening hours?)