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Only Mostly Dead

, , , , , | Working | July 27, 2018

(This story happened to my mom a few years ago. She and my dad fly down to California to surprise my dad’s older sister for her birthday. My mom and my dad’s two sisters go to a spa the next day as a birthday present for my aunt. My mom is extremely — deathly — allergic to strawberries. At the spa, they have a juice/smoothie/drink bar and are ordering some items. The following occurs.)

Aunt #1: “Can I have a strawberry margarita, please?”

Aunt #2: “Oh, yes, I’ll have the same, thanks.”

Mom: “I’ll have a peach daiquiri, please. And I just need to tell you that I have a very severe strawberry allergy.”

Counter Clerk: “Okay, no problem.”

(She makes the two margaritas, pouring the contents from a blender into the two glasses for my aunts. Then, she proceeds to pour the ingredients for my mom’s drink into the same blender.)

Mom: “Oh, I’m sorry, but I can’t have that if you use the same blender. As I said, I have a very severe allergy. It’s life-threatening.”

Counter Clerk: “Really? There’s only a little bit in there.”

Mom: “And I’ll only be a little bit dead if I drink any of that.”

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