Old School Solutions To New School Problems

, , , | Related | June 18, 2018

(This takes place every spring and summer without fail. Several times.)

Me: *sneezing* “Ugh, I hate not being able to breathe.”

Grandma: “You wouldn’t be so sick if you’d just go outside more. You need some sunshine and fresh air.”

Me: “Grandma. I am allergic to sunshine, and I’m allergic to nearly everything that’s in the fresh air right now. I just was outside, and it’s the reason I’m miserable. Can I just stay here, where I’m able to be an asthmatic vampire in peace?”

(Every time we talk. I love you, Grandma.)

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