Old Ladies… Uh… Find A Way

, , | Right | January 24, 2019

(A coworker and I are working box office one night. This particular summer night we are open late for a midnight premiere, but with fans also come the weirdos. Three ladies, probably in their 50s and obviously intoxicated, approach my till.)

Customer #1: “Hi. We’ll take three senior citizens for [Movie #1], please.”

Me: “I’m very sorry, but our last showing for [Movie #1] was at six. We do, however, have a showing for tomorrow at—“

Customer #1: *interrupting* “Okay, well, how about three tickets to [Movie #2].”

Me: “I’m sorry, that movie comes out tomorrow and we don’t have a showing for today.”

Customer #1: “Well, you are showing [Early Premiere Movie], so why not [Movie #2]?”

Me: “[Early Premiere Movie] is an extremely popular film that gets to premiere early for fans. [Movie #2] isn’t as big.”

Customer #2: “Okay, okay, don’t listen to her. We want three tickets to [Movie #3].”

Me: “We can definitely do that. That’ll be $32.85.”

Customer #3: “What?! I am not paying that much to go see a movie.”

(The three begin discussing their plans. Eventually, [Customer #3] turns to me.)

Customer #3: “So, we’re gonna go bowling. Do you know of any bowling places that have a bar?”

Customer #2: “What do you mean, any bowling places with bars? He’s not a day over thirteen; he doesn’t know anything about drinking.”

(After this, [Customer #2] notices my name tag, showing that my favorite movie is ‘Jurassic Park.’)

Customer #2:Jurassic Park is your favorite movie? How old are you? That movie wasn’t even out when you were born!”

Me: “I’m seventeen, and yes, it was. It was released in 1993; I was born in 1998.”

Customer #2: “See, you can’t like that movie; you weren’t even born when it came out.”

(I stare, kind of dumbfounded, as my coworker is trying to keep her laughter inside. Luckily, [Customer #3] finds a nearby bowling alley and bar that is open.)

Customer #3: “Okay, ladies, I found one; let’s leave babyface here.”

(The three women left the theater and my coworker let out all her chuckles. I told my supervisor, who also lost it, eventually leading to my nickname that lasted until the day I left: Babyface)

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