Okay, Let’s Hash This Out…

I work as a cook. I’m working a double shift. The first nine hours or so, I can’t get away long enough to breathe because of all the orders. The second half is dead but I have to do all the prep work so I still can’t really get a break. Finally, I have everything done, but I’m so fed up with everyone and everything.

Literally five minutes before my coworker relief usually comes in, we get a customer. He has to order half the menu, and specifically, he wants gravy covering all his food.

As I’m finishing his food, I hear him asking me something that sounds like:

Customer: “Is that my food?”

Me: “Yes.”

This repeats three times. He’s the only customer so it’s literally the only order, so it’s obviously his.

I have hearing issues and I can’t hear anything when I’m cooking, and talking to me is literally one of my biggest pet peeves. I’m not your waitress. I’m the cook. Leave me alone!

My coworker shows up so I’m ready to run.

Customer: “My food is supposed to be stacked.”

Me: “Uh, what do you mean?”

Customer: “Stacked! It’s supposed to be stacked!”

Me: “Okay, how do you want it stacked, then?”

Customer: “The bacon on the hash browns… Ugh, I’ll just do it myself!”

Me: “I can do it, but I need to know how you want it.”

Customer: *Yelling* “I’ll just do it myself!”

I hand over the plate.

Me: “Okay. Let me just get you the gravy, then.”

Customer: “This is supposed to have extra hash and extra cheese!”

Me: *Fed up* “Sorry, but that’s not what the ticket says. I’ll put that hash down for you, though.”

He starts talking about how horrible of a cook I am and how I can’t get anything right. I’m seeing red, but I throw the hash on the grill, go up to my waitress, and tell her:

Me: “He’s b****ing because he wanted extra cheese and hash, so you’d better charge him.”

Then, I turn to the replacement cook.

Me: “I’ve been here for over twelve hours. I am not waiting for the hash. I did put it down, so take your time, but I’m out. I’m done.”

I have no idea how it all turned out because I was so far done that I wanted to throw a temper tantrum.