Object Permanently Employed

While I have a permanent desk in my office, the nature of my job ensures I’m not sat at it all day. I am attending meetings, giving presentations, and catching up with peers from other departments all throughout the day. 

I am walking back to my desk with presentation supplies in a box when a new manager corners me.

Manager: *Aggressively.* “Where the f*** have you been?!”

Me: “Whoa, aggressive much? I was giving a presentation, as is clearly indicated on my calendar.”

Manager: “How convenient that your calendar always has you away from your desk!”

Me: “It’s… it’s the job I was hired to do. As my manager, you do… know that, right?”

Manager: “Of course I know that! Don’t talk down to me!”

Me: “Then I don’t see what the issue is.”

Manager: “One of the first things we learn in a professional workplace is that if you’re not seen working, then you’re not working! An empty desk all day is a bad look!”

Me: “And one of the first things we learn as humans is object permanence. Me not at desk is not me not working. Does understand?”

Manager: “That’s it! You and I are going to sit down and—”

Me: “—No can do, I have a meeting with [His Manager] in five minutes to do a post mortem on the presentation, and after that I’m scheduled to leave midday to attend [Seminar] in the afternoon. The seminar that your predecessor approved. Put something in my calendar for a chat, mmmkay?”

I waltzed out there, angry but composed. Luckily, my next meeting was with his manager, who said he would tell him to chill the f*** out – which he did, by ignoring me until he was “moved on” three months later.