Now You REALLY Need A Drink

I’m away for work. I’ve been on the go since 2:00 am and it’s now 6:00 pm. I’m ready for a drink, so I head to my hotel’s bar.

Me: “Can I get a whisky and Coke, please?”

Employee #1: “We only have beer.”

Me: “I can see the whisky from here.”

Employee #1: “That’s…” *reads the label* “…vodka. You want vodka?”

Me: “No, next to it, the whisky.”

She moves the wrong way.

Employee #1: “This is also vodka.”

Me: “No the other way, the [Brand].”

She can’t find it, despite it being right in front of her face. Another staff member comes over.

Employee #2: “What’s wrong?”

Employee #1: “He keeps saying he wants whisky but pointing to vodka.”

Me: “No, I want a whisky, any whisky. With Coke. Please.”

Employee #2: “I don’t think we have whisky.”

Me: *Groans* “Is there a manager I can speak to?”

Employee #1: “I can’t deal. You put up with him.”

She storms off while we wait for a manager.

Manager: “Is there a problem?”

Me: “Only that you employ bar staff that don’t know what whisky is. All I want is a whisky and Coke. Both of your staff tell me you don’t have any.”

Manager: “How much have you had to drink with us?”

Me: “Nothing. All I want is a drink. It’s been a very long day, and I can see the bottle, which apparently doesn’t exist.”

Manager: “What’s wrong with the [Brand]?”

Employee #2: “Err, nothing. Is that whisky?”

Manager & Me: “Yes!”

I eventually got my drink, which was at least comped. I found a pub down the road and went there for the rest of my stay. Never before or since have I seen such clueless staff behind a bar.