Not Very Closed Minded, Part 29

(I work at a branch of a well-known east coast convenience store. Today is the first day of a major renovation, including a complete remodel. Every day for the past two weeks, we’ve been reminding customers that we will be closed for over a month during this time. This morning, all the staff show up to count and package all the remaining merchandise to be shipped to other locations. The construction crews are already well into demolition.)

Manager: “Hey, [My Name], you and [Coworker] go outside and stand by the doors and make sure no customers try to come in.”

Me: “Really? Do you think anybody’s going to think we’re open with the parking lot blocked off, the sign being taken down, and construction workers currently sawing their way through the deli?”

Manager: “Don’t be a smarta**; just go.”

([Coworker] and I go outside, glad to just take a cigarette break and not have to do any real work. We’re laughing about how stupid this is, until not one minute later, a man walks up.)

Would-Be Customer: “Hey, are you guys closed?”

Me: *stunned silence*

Would-Be Customer: “Do you think you could sell me a cup of coffee?”

Me: *as construction workers are literally carrying out our empty registers and destroyed counter* “Uh… Sorry, we began our renovation today. I can’t sell you anything; we’re closed.”

Would-Be Customer: “That sucks! When do you think I can come back later?”

Me: *as construction workers, not three feet away, start to use jackhammers to break up the tile on the floor* “Uh… December?”

Related:
Not Very Closed Minded, Part 28
Not Very Closed Minded, Part 27
Not Very Closed Minded, Part 26