Not Quite The Crema Of The Crop, Part 2

Regular Customer: “I’ll have a toffee-hazelnut iced coffee, but can you make it decaf?”

Me: “Sure, no problem. Switching to ‘D,’ then?”

Regular Customer: “Yeah, my doctor told me I should cut down on sugar, so I’m going with decaf!”

Me: “Um… there’s no sugar in regular or decaf coffee. But there is sugar in the two syrups I use to make that flavor; are you sure you want them?”

Regular Customer: “Oh yes, I’m not cutting out every bit of sugar! Just the caffeine sugars.”

Me: “There are zero calories, zero sugars in plain black coffee, either regular or decaf.”

Regular Customer: “Yeah, but my sister says she cut out iced coffee and she’s lost 20 pounds! I have to have my coffee, but I figured I could just do decaf instead.”

Me: “I can use sugar-free flavors for you if you’re trying to—”

Regular Customer: “No! I hate that fake stuff. Just the decaf iced coffee with toffee and hazelnut. Oh, and extra cream.”

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Not Quite The Crema Of The Crop