When In Doubt, Overdo The Under

(I work at a clothing store. A young girl approaches my desk.)

Girl: “Hi, I need to, uh, return this stuff.”

(She slides a gift bag crammed with thongs across the counter. It has thongs of every, color, shape, and size – ranging from small to extra-large.)

Me: “Okay, this is an awful lot of underwear you, ah, need to return. Do you have a receipt?”

Girl: “No. It was a gift. From my dad.”

Me: “Your father bought you all of this?”

Girl: “Sure. He didn’t know which size to get.”