Not In Receipt Of Reality
Customer: “I need to return this.”
Me: “Can I see your receipt, please?”
Customer: *Disgusted sigh.* “Why do you need that?”
Me: “Because this item you’re trying to return? We don’t sell it.”
Customer: “Why are you lying?! Like, you know every single thing you sell?! Just give me my money!”
Me: “Not without a receipt, which I know you don’t have, because we don’t sell this.”
Customer: “Why are you lying?!”
Me: “Bro, if I could process the return for you, I just would. In what universe is getting yelled at by a customer a better option than doing the five-minute return process? Is your brain made of worms?”
Customer: “F*** this place! I’m never shopping here again!”
Did he shop here, ever?
