Not Feeling Like You’ve Won The Lottery Here

(I’m a woman in my early twenties. An older man, probably around 70 or so, comes to my counter to buy a lottery ticket.)

Customer: “Is it a winner?”

Me: *flashing a huge smile* “I hope so!”

Customer: “Good. Because if it’s not I’m going to have to come back here and slap you.”

(I have no idea how to respond to this, so I ignore it and turn around to straighten the tickets and hope he’ll leave without saying anything else. Of course, I’m not that lucky.)

Customer: “Don’t worry. If I win, I’ll still come back, but I’ll give you a big old kiss. How’s that?”

(I told him I had to go check on something and walked away. I haven’t seen him since, and I’m glad, because I don’t know if getting slapped or kissed by him would have been worse!)