Not Exactly The Leader Of The Pack(age)

Years ago, I was working the registers at a retail pharmacy when a man stormed back in holding a box of cold medicine.

Customer: “I need a manager. Right now.”

Me: “Of course, sir. Can I ask what the issue is?”

Customer: “You people sold me defective medicine. It’s sealed shut! I can’t get it open!”

I glance at the box. It’s one of those common cold medicine packs where you push the pill through a foil-and-plastic blister. Nothing unusual. My manager comes up from the back.

Manager: “Good afternoon, sir. What seems to be the problem?”

Customer: “I just bought these, and they don’t work. I can’t get the pills out! It’s defective!”

Manager: “Do you mean… the packaging?”

Customer: “Yes! I can’t open it! I’ve been at it for half an hour. This is ridiculous. I want a refund, and I’m calling corporate.”

The manager blinks, takes the package, presses gently on the back of one tablet, and with a soft pop, it pushes right through the foil. She hands it back.

Manager: “Like that, sir.”

Customer: “…Well, it shouldn’t be that hard!”

Manager: “That’s the child-proof feature working as designed.”

He stood there, red-faced, mumbled something about “terrible customer service,” and stormed out clutching his box of pills.