Not Ever Working, Part 13

(I am visiting a fast food restaurant near my job. I’m there several times a week for lunch or dinner, and on this day there’s a new employee.)

Me: “I’d like the new [new sandwich that is being heavily advertised and is displayed on a huge banner behind the counter] with a Coke to go, please.”

Employee: “What the f*** is that?”

Me: “The [new sandwich]… it’s on the banner behind you.”

Employee: “Ain’t nobody told me about a new sandwich.”

(Eventually, with the help of a coworker, she rings me up. I wait a while for my food, and it doesn’t seem to be coming. I’m the only one in the restaurant, so clearly something has gone wrong.)

Me: “Hey, can you check and see if they forgot about my order in the back? I’ve been waiting a while.”

Employee: “I’m not in charge of making the food.”

Me: “Well, yeah, but can you just walk over there and ask them if they’re working on my order? I only have a short lunch.”

(The employee stares at me like I’ve asked her to go to the moon.)

Employee: “I just said, I’m not in charge of the food.”

Me: “All I’m asking is for you to walk over there, or just shout over, and see if they’ve forgotten about my order.”

Employee: “I don’t know anything about the food.”

(I decide to lean over the counter and shout back myself. They had indeed forgotten my food, so they quickly make it, bring it out, and apologize profusely. Thankfully, I never saw that employee again.)