Not A Dull Way To Go

(Our restaurant is part of a chain, so the direct superior to the branch manager is the regional manager, who visits from time to time. This regional manager is not very popular with the employees, since his “working in the field” practically means he comes in and starts looking for mistakes, criticising the staff for lamps which aren’t hanging at the same height, or for having stuff they really need laying in sight because it “doesn’t look nice.” One of my coworkers, known to be a wannabe tough guy, despises the man. This coworker recently put in his notice.)

Coworker: “Pity [Regional Manager] didn’t show up this week. If he does, I’m really going to act like a total weirdo. [Other Coworker] and I even rehearsed a bit for it.”

Me: “Really?”

Coworker: “Yeah, we would put on our cap the wrong way and shout–” *stupid, childlike voice* “’HEEEYYYYY, [REGIONAL MANAGER]! WHY DO THE KNIVES ALWAYS GO DULL?’” And then we’d smash the knives on the metal table, like this.” *makes a smashing gesture*

Me: “Would you really have done that?”

Coworker: “Yeah, because then, he would have fired me! And then I could be like, ‘HAHA! I ALREADY PUT IN MY NOTICE!’”