Not Acting Tip-Top

(My friends and I have decided to try this new restaurant in town after work. Our waitress has been quite rude and has been blatantly ignoring us for the most part. After bringing us the wrong food, and actually taking out her phone to text someone while we complain, we ask for the manager.)

Waitress: “Fine, but he won’t do nothing. My dad’s the owner.”

(The waitress smirks and walks away. The manager comes over, and listens to our complaints, looking completely exasperated.)

Manager: “I’m so sorry about your experience today; there will be no charge for your meals. If you would like to order something else, I’ll oversee it myself. Again, no charge.”

Me: “Is her dad really the owner?”

Manager: *rubbing his temples* “Yes. I wish there was more I could do; my apologies.”

(We elect to leave and go somewhere else. As we get up, the waitress rushes over.)

Waitress: “You didn’t tip.”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Waitress: “You aren’t leaving without leaving a tip! This isn’t a fast food place where you come and go like trailer trash; you need to tip here!”

Me: “Your service sucks. Why would we tip you for that?”

(The waitress throws a screaming fit at us over the issue, causing other patrons to stare. The manager tries to calm her down, but she won’t back down.)

Me: “You want a tip? Fine.”

(I pull a $10 bill out of my pocket, shove it into my water glass, and place a menu on top. I quickly turn it upside down on the table and slide the menu out, leaving the full glass upside down with money floating inside.)

Me: “ENJOY! Have fun cleaning that up when you get it out.”

(We walk out while she fumes and the manager falls into peals of laughter.)