Not A Remote Chance Of Working

| Friendly | March 27, 2014

(I’m a girl in the first year of university. I go into the town with a male friend in my course. We’re both 18. We are just walking around until we find a shop that sells random novelty items.)

Friend: “Hey, look! A remote control!”

(It’s got various rude commands like ‘take off your clothes”‘, ‘suck my d***’ etc. printed on the buttons.)

Me: *roll eyes slightly* “Oh, yeah?”

Friend: “Gosh, I NEED to get this.”

Me: *sigh* “No. Please don’t waste £5 on this bit of plastic.”

Friend: “But it’ll be fun!” *proceeds to check out with a big grin*

(Back in the hall of residence…)

Friend: *rips off the packaging, points the remote control at me and presses the buttons repeatedly and angrily* “Urgh!”

Me: “Um, [Friend], what ARE you doing?”

Friend: “This thing doesn’t work! They’d better give me a refund!”

Me: “Did you REALLY think it would work?”

Friend: *offended* “Of course! Why else would I pay £5 for it?”

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