Me No Speak Americano, Part 4

, | Right | September 1, 2017

(We have a drink menu with an extensive choice of coffees. A couple comes in, they browse the menu, and then come up to the bar.)

Male Customer: “A latte, please.”

Female Customer: “Okay, well, I guess, could I have… what size cups do you have?”

Me: “Well, our coffees are all standard sizing on the menu, but we can also offer a smaller or larger.” *I’m indicating the various stacked cups behind me as I speak, from huge, to standard, to small, to espresso*

Female Customer: “Oh. Okay. Well, can I have like, a small strong black coffee, in a large cup?”

Me: “So, an espresso, in a normal cup? Or black coffee with less water than usual?”

Female Customer: “Well, like, a strong coffee, in a small cup. But not much water. But not one of those really little cups.”

Me: *not really understanding, but it’s quiet, so I figure I can work it out* “…Okay. Take a seat and I’ll bring it over. Thanks!”

(I make a latte in a standard sized cup for the male customer and a strong black coffee, up to about 3/4 of a smaller cup for her. I take these over along with an extra jug of hot water in case she wants to top up. Because I was confused, I ask her if it looks okay when I take it over. She looks a bit confused, too, but says yes. Two minutes later:)

Female Customer: *approaches bar* “Hi, um, what size coffee did you make him?” *gestures at husband*

Me: “Just a standard latte?”

Female Customer: “Oh. Well, that’s the cup size I wanted.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry. Shall I make you another?”

Female Customer: *getting annoyed at me* “Urgh, no. Don’t bother. Don’t you do normal coffees, like Americanos?”

Me: “Yes! It’s on the menu…”

Female Customer: “Oh. Well, that’s what I wanted all along!”

Me No Speak Americano, Part 3
Me No Speak Americano, Part 2
Me No Speak Americano

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