No Ifs And Buts If It Has Touched Butts

I’m paying at the counter at a large clothing store. There’s a sign up, bold and prominent, saying:

Sign: “We cannot accept returns on underwear and intimates for any reason. All sales on these items are FINAL SALE.”

Me: “I can’t believe you have to have that sign up. Surely that’s common sense.”

Employee: “That’s not even that bad. I have a second job, and we have the same sign up there, too.”

Me: “Where is the second shop?”

Employee: “A sex shop.”

Eww.