No ID, No Idea, Part 9

(I’m working the cash register. I’m supposed to card anyone who looks under 30 when they are buying cigarettes.)

Me: “Hello, how are you today?”

Customer: “Yeah, good. Can I have a box of [cigarette brand].”

Me: “Sure! May I see your ID?” *the customer looks around 25 years old*

Customer: “Excuse me?”

Me: “I need to see your ID. The law is becoming very strict about carding people and you look under 30.”

Customer: “Oh, I see! You just want my ID to see my address so you can know where I live. You’re probably going to sneak into my house in the middle of the night and take these back from me. I’m 39. I shouldn’t be carded, so that’s the only reason I see!”

Me: “Yep, you got me. That’ll be $6.99.”

Customer: “I’ll be watching. don’t think I won’t be!”

Me: “Have a good day, sir.”