(My husband and I are out with some friends, including a girl we’ve been to several concerts with.)

Husband: *to our friend* “Hey, did you hear about the concert at the casino for Styx and Journey? It’s just a tribute band, but it sounds awesome.”

Friend: “That sounds cool.”

Husband: “Yeah, and it’s only $25 for two people; want to go?”

Me: “You’re talking about the one on Valentine’s Day, right? Where it’s 25 bucks per couple? As in, you’re asking a friend to a Valentine’s Day concert instead of your wife?”

Husband: *a little hesitant* “Uh, well…”

(Our friend is cracking up laughing now, and so is her boyfriend.)

Me: “I told you about this concert, but you haven’t asked me to go, but now you’re asking someone else to spend Valentine’s evening with?”

Husband: “You can go with [Friend’s Boyfriend]!”

This story is part of our Valentine’s Day roundup!

Read the next Valentine’s Day roundup story!

Read the Valentine’s Day roundup!

(My little brother is about two at the time, and just starting to talk. He has learned the word ‘sister’ and that it means me. I’m fourteen years older than he is.)

Little brother: “You’re my big sister, sister.”

Me: “Yes, yes I am. If I’m your sister, what does that make you?”

(I’m hoping he’ll come up with the word brother.)

Little brother: “Happy.”

This story is part of our Sisters’ Day roundup!

Read the next Sisters’ Day story here!

Read the Sisters’ Day roundup!

(I’m at my community college, where I need to stay late to make up a class I missed earlier in the week. My mother and I are texting about how I’m going to get home, as I cannot drive and the buses aren’t agreeing with the time. We are huge Lord of the Rings fans, and my name is very similar to one of the countries in the books.)

Me: “Which parking lot?”

Mom: “The one west of building 3, towards 185th.”

Me: “Which west? I don’t know the campus well.”

Mom: “West, towards the wildlife refuge and the setting sun. When it sets.”

Me: “Not to the eastern sunrise on the fifth day?”

Mom: “No, look to my ending light on the Thurs Day, at sunset look to the west.”

Me: “Okay. I’ll be out at 9.”

Mom: “I will call you if you need aid.”

Me: “And Rowan will answer.”

(My younger sister is a freshman in high school. She is complaining about her homework during dinner.)

Sister: “I really hate this play I have to read.”

Me: “What play is it?”

Sister: “Romeo and Juliet. Why can’t the characters have normal names, like Smith and Jones? Why do they have to have weird names like Montague and Copulate?”

(I’m a girl, and I am texting my Dad. My 17th birthday was the week before, and I got a 3DS.)

Me: “Guess what? GUESS WHAT!? THEY JUST ANNOUNCED THE NEW POKÉMON. YOU’RE RIGHT BEHIND YOUR PERSON, INSTEAD OF ABOVE. THERE ARE NEW STARTERS. ONE’S A FOX. I’M FREAKING OUT RIGHT NOW, YOU HAVE NO IDEA. IT’S ONLY FOR THE 3DS. THANK YOU SO MUCH. OH MY GOD!”

(I continue texting him about the new game. He responds a few hours later.)

Dad: “Well, at least it’s not boys and beer.”

This story is part of our Pokémon roundup!

Read the next Pokémon Roundup story!

Read the Pokémon Roundup!