(I am a customer at my regular hardware supply store, which most local contractors have accounts at. I’m standing in a large queue at the cash register with a few items for a job I’m working on. The customer in front of me seems annoyed and is asking many questions about a special light bulb for her house.)

Cashier: “I’m sorry, but from what you’ve told me, I don’t think that particular bulb will work with your fixture. However, the row of bulbs above where you got it will work!”

Customer #1: *more annoyed* “So, I have to pick out another one? Can you at least show me?”

Cashier: “I’m sorry, I can’t leave the register right now. But [Employee] can help you.”

(She points to her coworker twenty feet away in the lighting section. The customer begins heading there, but first asks…)

Customer #1: “Will I have to stand in line again?”

(The cashier and I look at each other and shrug, so we both wait out of courtesy. However, the customer is gone for quite a while although the aisle she went to is very close, so the cashier decides to help me first. However, halfway through my transaction, [Customer #1] comes back and goes straight to the front of the line.)

Customer #1: “Excuse me! I believe I was first!”

Cashier: “Oh! Ma’am. I’m sorry. You were gone for a while, and he only had a few items and I thought–”

Customer #1: “Whatever! Just ring me up!”

(The cashier nervously looks at me and I nod that it’s okay for her to go first. By now, there are at least six people standing in the queue behind me. The cashier begins to ring her up.)

Customer #1: “You know, that was really rude! You should all be more helpful here!”

Me: “Ma’am, she was only doing her job. This is a small business and they are very courteous and helpful here.”

Customer #1: *turns around to me* “I don’t care! They need to be more efficient and shouldn’t be so rude. I’m on my break. I don’t have time for this!”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m a contractor; I lose money for every minute I am away from the worksite. Your time is no more valuable than anyone else’s, and [Cashier] works very hard and is very good at her job.”

Customer #1: “W-well… I was only saying that so they know that they are wasting a customer’s time!”

(A customer behind me interrupts her.)

Customer #2: “Hey, lady! We’re all contractors. You are wasting our time and money!”

(Everyone else in line verbally and visibly motioned in agreement. The first customer finished her transaction and quickly left, embarrassed. The cashier was so thankful that she went and told the store manager, who gave everyone in the queue a keychain flashlight for free. I love that store! Remember to support your local businesses!)

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(I am looking for a book from the ‘holds’ section of my local library. An old woman, about 75 years old, approaches me.)

Old Woman: “Excuse me, but can you see if there is a book under [name]? I left my glasses in the car, and I can’t read the print.”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, there is one.” *I hand her the book*

Old Woman: “What is the title?”

Me: “A Double Barrelled Detective Story, by Mark Twain.”

Old Woman: “Thank you, that’s exactly what I’m looking for.”

(Later on, I go to check out a couple books. I see the old woman in line in front of me.)

Old Woman: *to employee* “This young man helped me find my book. I would like to thank him.”

Me: “No problem, ma’am.”

Employee: “He volunteers here sometimes. He’s quite helpful.”

Old Woman: “Oh! Then maybe he could help me find another book I’m looking for. All of my friends have it, and I want to know what all the fuss is about!”

Employee: “What book would that be?”

Old Woman: “It’s called 50 Shades of Grey.”

(I work for a well-known electronics store chain that has their own repair section for electronics. A high school-aged customer brings in her laptop to be checked out.)

Customer: “I have no idea what’s wrong! It just won’t do anything.”

(My coworker takes her laptop and runs a virus scan.)

Coworker: “You have quite a few viruses. It’ll be [price] to remove them.”

Customer: “Oh, but I have a warranty! Those are covered, right?”

Coworker: “Unfortunately, the plan you have only covers accidental physical damage.”

Customer: “Who the f*** do you guys think you are? You’re nothing! You have to fix this!”

Coworker: “Unfortunately, we can’t unless you pay.”

(The customer grabs the laptop and leaves the store. It’s a slow day, so we’re joking around near the front doors when we see the girl open her laptop, place it on the asphalt, step and scrape it into the ground, before picking it back up and bringing it back in.)

Customer: “While I was walking to the car, I accidentally dropped it!”

Me: “You know, we saw you scraping it up outside, right? You did it right in front of the window.”

Customer: “NO, IT WAS ACCIDENTAL DAMAGE! YOU CAN’T PROVE THAT I DID THIS!”

Coworker: “We can always go get the security footage.”

(The customer made a huge fuss, so our manager agreed to take and send the laptop to the service center. Big surprise: it got sent back unrepaired because it wasn’t accidental damage.)

(A customer comes in with a couple of kids, talking on her cell phone.)

Customer: *to me* “Two.” *continues talking on the phone*

Me: “For the indoor playground today?”

(The customer nods and holds out $20. I make sure to make eye contact with them, since she’s still talking on her phone.)

Me: “Okay, that will be $8.”

(I take the $20 and hand her the change, and since she is clearly distracted, I also make sure to get her a receipt before I put the wristbands on the kids.)

Customer: *to her phone* “She didn’t even tell me how much it was! She just took my money!”

This story is part of the People Who Should Get Off Their Phones roundup!

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(A young couple known for having drug problems regularly hangs out at our store. One day, the girl is so high she trips over her own feet and falls outside our door. Her boyfriend makes a huge fuss and claim we have to pay for it because she ruined it at our property. We check with our main office and discover we have no legal duty to pay her. A few weeks pass before they show up at our store again.)

Me: “Welcome to [store], how can I help you?”

Girl: “Don’t you remember me? I fell outside of here. It’s your store’s fault because the ground was uneven. That’s dangerous.”

(The ground outside was fine, and had been when she fell, but I didn’t want to argue.)

Me: “Oh, yes, I remember that, I hope you feel better from that fall.”

Girl: “Well, my phone got broken.”

Me: “Oh, that’s too bad.”

Girl: “It’s your store’s fault it got broken. You should pay up so I can buy a new one.”

Me: “How is it broken?”

Girl: “The screen is broken and nothing works. I can’t read messages or take calls or anything. It’s just ruined.”

Me: “Well, here’s the address to the main office, you can mail them and make your claim.”

Girl: “No. I need the cash.”

Me: “I can’t give out cash for a broken phone I haven’t seen, for a price I don’t even know is legit.”

(The girl grumbles and cusses for a while, but agrees to write up a claim to send. Meanwhile, her phone starts to ring and she answers it, talking to her boyfriend.)

Me: “Was that the ruined phone?”

Girl: “Yes, look at that crack!”

(She shows me a small hairline crack at the side, but it’s otherwise functioning properly.)

Me: “You said it couldn’t even make phone calls.”

Girl: *turns a pale and walks out without a word*

(Thankfully, we never saw her again.)