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Repeat After Me: Names Are Your Friends

, , | Right | January 14, 2008

Customer: “Can I get a vegetarian burrito with chicken?”

Me: “You mean, a chicken burrito?”

Customer: “Well, what’s in that?”

Me: “Chicken.”


This story is part of our Vegetarian roundup!

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The Epitome of Lazy

, , | Right | January 13, 2008

Me: “Thank you for calling [Store]; how may I help you?”

Lady: “I would like to make a return.”

Me: “Alright, that should be fine. We allow returns on regularly priced clothing as long as it has the tags on it.”

Lady: “Alright, great. So do I give you my phone number?”

Me: “Pardon…?”

Lady: “To do the return?”

Me: “I’m sorry, you need to come into the store to do returns. We need to get the item you’re returning back.”

Lady: “That’s ridiculous! You mean I need to get gas for my car and COME DOWN THERE?!”

Me: “Yes…”

Lady: *click*


This story is part of our Lazy Customers roundup!

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A Few Beans Short Of A Latte

, , | Right | January 13, 2008

Customer: “Excuse me, but I ordered the vegetable soup!”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, I know.”

Customer: “I don’t see any vegetables in this!”

Me: “Ma’am, that’s because it’s your coffee.”

Customer: “Oh.”

(She was surprisingly nice for the rest of the meal and left a hefty tip.)


This story is part of our Soup roundup!

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Speaking Stupidese

, , | Right | January 13, 2008

(A customer comes in and goes to a display rack of boots.)

Me: “Can I help you?”

Customer: “Where are the boxes with all the shoes in them?”

Me: “…”

Her Friend: “She means, do you have these boots in a size 8…”

Insatiable

, | Right | January 12, 2008

Me: “One tall cappuccino!”

Customer: *picks up drink, opens lid and looks inside* “Excuse me. There’s a lot of room in here. The top is nothing but foam.”

Me: “Yes, that’s what a cappuccino is. It’s basically the same thing as a latte but with more foam.”

Customer: “I don’t get you guys. You guys make me think I’m buying more by calling a small drink a tall, and now you just fill my drink up with foam.”

Me: “I’m sorry. If you’d like, I could just get you a latte.”

Customer: “No, that’s alright but I will take a passion tea lemonade.”

(I do her order and she comes back.)

Customer: “WHY IS THERE SO MUCH ICE?! F*** YOU GUYS AND YOUR RIP OFF DRINKS!”

(Customer storms off with the drink and chucks it at the window outside.)