Right Working Romantic Related Learning Friendly Healthy Legal Inspirational Unfiltered

All of our stories, starting with the newest!

This. Is. High Bar-ta.

, , , | Learning Right | December 28, 2009

(I coach an Advanced Recreational group of kids aged 11-14. I’m spotting one of the boys on the high bar when his arm slips and he elbows me in the face.)

Me: “Thanks. Please try not to do that again.”

Child: “Sorry!” *laughs*

(He tries it again, and elbows me in the face again. This time, my lip is bleeding so I go over to the door to spit the blood out of my mouth into the garbage. As I’m doing this, one of the dads that is watching from the lobby runs in.)

Dad: “That was freakin’ amazing!”

Me: “What was?”

Dad: “From the lobby, it looked like he elbowed you in the face, you thanked him, and asked him for another. Then you came and spat your blood into the garbage as a show of dominance over the rest of them. FRICKIN’ AWESOME!” *high fives me*


Did you find this story using our Gyms Roundup?

Click here to go to the next story!

Click here to go back to the roundup!

H2Slow

, , , , , | Right | December 28, 2009

Customer: “Hello. I bought this phone from you and I accidentally got some orange juice on it.”

Me: “Okay, well, if it didn’t get too much on it, it might be okay. Is it turning on?”

Customer: “No.”

(I take the phone and it has a lot of moisture damage.)

Me: “It looks like there’s quite a lot of juice on this.”

Customer: “Oh, that’s not juice. I ran it under the tap to get the juice off!”


This story is part of our Water roundup!

Read the next Water roundup story!

Read the Water roundup!

Not To La-boar The Point

, , , | Right | December 28, 2009

Me: “Hello, welcome to [Store]. What would you like, sir?”

Customer: “Actually, I have a question. What is ham made of?”

Me: “It’s made of pigs.”

Customer: “Pigs? What are pigs made of?”

Me: “Pigs, the animal.”

Customer: *confused look*

Me: “Oink oink.”

Customer: “Oh! Does that mean it’s not vegan?”


This story is part of our Vegan Roundup!

Read the next Vegan Roundup story!

Read the Vegan Roundup!

It’s Going To Be A Long Day

, , , | Right | December 28, 2009

Me: “What type of Internet do you have?”

Customer: “Internet Explorer.”

Me: “No, sorry, I meant what type of Internet, like your ISP?”

Customer: “Internet.”

Me: “No, what type.”

Customer: “Uh… modem?”

Me: “What kind of modem?”

Customer: “Black.”

Me: “Is it plugged into a phone cable or a coaxial cable? Like a cable you’d plug into your TV.”

Customer: “It’s plugged in to…  the wall.”


This story is part of our Tech Support roundup!

Read the next Tech Support roundup story!

Read the Tech Support roundup!

Can’t Cedar Forest For The Trees

, , , , , | Right | December 25, 2009

Customer: “These Christmas trees all look so fake! I want to get one fresh from the Everglades!”

(I chuckle, and then realize he is serious.)

Me: “Sir, the Everglades aren’t exactly known for their Christmas trees.”

Customer: “Oh yeah! I forgot, it’s all frozen.”

Me: “No, sir, the Everglades are in the middle of Florida.”

Customer: “Oh, well. I was never good at geometry anyway.”


This story is part of our Geography roundup.

Click here to read the next story!

Click here to go to the roundup.