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In Need Of Humble Pi

, , , , | Right | May 5, 2010

Me: “Would you like to donate to [Charity] today?”

Customer: “Okay. Round my total up to $30.”

(I pull out a calculator to figure out how much it is to round up to $30. The customer’s total is $25.78.)

Customer: “It’s sad that you need a calculator to figure that out. It’s $7.32.”

Me: “Actually, ma’am, it’s $4.22.”

Customer: “Oh.”


This story is part of our “Customers terrible at math” roundup!

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Last Of The NonFictions

, , | Right | May 4, 2010

(I am a customer and I have been looking all over for a certain book. I see someone reading it.)

Me: “Excuse me, but could you show me where you found that?”

Girl: “Yeah, just follow me!”

(She leads me to a shelf of books.)

Girl: “I found it right there!”

Me: “I don’t see it.”

Girl: “Oh, that’s because I took the last one!”

Not Caught Up In The Web

, , , | Right | May 4, 2010

Me: “Thank you for calling. This is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “My mother’s computer won’t connect to the Internet.”

Me: “All right, let’s see if we can figure out the issue.”

(I spend five minutes troubleshooting the connection, and still can’t get it connected.)

Me: “I can’t find anything wrong with your computer. Is it a desktop or a laptop?”

Customer: “I don’t know. She’s in Florida, so I’ll have to call and ask her.”

Me: “Okay, do you happen to know her Internet service provider?”

Customer: “Yes, it’s you guys.”

Me: “Sir, we’re a repair center. Are you sure she has Internet?”

Customer: “Doesn’t it come free with the computer?”

Me: “No, they stopped doing that a while ago.”

Customer: “Figures. I’ll tell her!”

A Father’s Love Is Very Console-ing

, , , , | Right | May 4, 2010

Customer: “Excuse me, could you give me some advice, please?”

Me: “Sure, how can I help?”

Customer: “I was looking to buy a Nintendo 360 for my son.”

Customer’s Son: “Dad! It’s an Xbox360!”

Customer: *to me* “This is how much help I need. Would you, please?”


This story is part of the Embarrassing Parents roundup!

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This story is part of our Father’s Day roundup.

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No Clue At The Zoo

, , , , , , | Right | May 4, 2010

(We are hosting a visiting special exhibit featuring animals endemic to Madagascar. A customer approaches me.)

Customer: “Excuse me, I don’t think I saw the Madagascar inside the exhibit.”

Me: “I’m sorry, what?”

Customer: “The Madagascar. Was that the furry thing in the glass cage?”

Me: “Madagascar is a country, ma’am. It’s an island nation off the coast of Africa.”

Customer: “Don’t lie to me! I’ve seen the movie!”


This story is part of our Clueless Zoo Customers roundup!

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Read the Clueless Zoo Customers roundup!


This story is part of our Geography roundup.

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