Never Too Sick To Be THAT Customer

I am pregnant, almost full-term with our daughter. A week prior, my husband and I have the tour of the hospital and all the information given to us about the upcoming birth, including the warnings that we need to get vaccinated against pertussis (whooping cough), as it’s starting to rear its ugly head in the area during this time (over a decade ago).

We sign the agreement to get the shot as well as to have our daughter get it, once born. We go back home, and all is well until a week later.

My husband and his assistant manager are catching up on paperwork when a customer comes in looking awful with a nasty cough.

She walks around and touches EVERYTHING she can get her hands on before she spots my husband.

Crazy Pertussis Customer: “Hey! I need help here. I need a cable, and d*** quick. I am sick and need to get home!”

Husband: “Sure thing. What kind of cable do you need?”

Crazy Pertussis Customer: “I don’t know, just a cable! Hurry up and find it! I gotta get home. The doctor just diagnosed me with pertussis!”

My husband pauses and backs up further away from her.

Husband: “I have to ask you to not get any closer to me. I am very sorry, but my wife is pregnant and due any day, and I don’t want to get this and get her and our daughter sick. I will gladly help you, but I cannot get any closer. Now, over here—”

Crazy Pertussis Customer: “HOW DARE YOU?! Discriminating against me because I have a cough? I don’t give a d*** about your brat and [slur for a woman] wife! If they get sick, who cares? I WANT MY D*** CABLE!”

Husband: “Get. Out. I said I would still help you and only asked that you didn’t get close. Your business here is not as important to me as the health and safety of my family. Leave now!”

Crazy Pertussis Customer: “WHO IS YOUR BOSS? I AM GETTING YOU FIRED!”

He pointed out the card with his district manager’s name on it, and the customer took one and stormed out. [Husband] and his assistant manager spent the rest of the day practically soaking the store and its products in Lysol.

He ended up getting a call from his district manager, who was seemingly about to bust a gut laughing. [District Manager] told him to ignore the complaint, as he was going to treat it as the trash it was. He assured my hubby that the customer was nuts and a fool to shop for a cable while basically suffocating.

Thankfully, none of my family ended up being infected, and my healthy baby girl was born a day or two later.