Never Pick A Fight With An Old Scottish Woman, Part 10
Someone told me about a certain story series on this site, knowing I had a perfect experience to add to the collection. A young woman approaches me in the underwear/lingerie section of our large clothes shop.
Customer: “I need to be measured for a bra. I just got some work done, and I’m a few sizes bigger!”
Me: “Oh, uh… congrats? I can put you in for an opening at 4 PM today?”
Customer: “I can’t see someone now?”
Me: “Our fitting expert is with a client at the moment.”
The woman looks over to see our fitting expert with said client, a woman in her sixties, it would seem.
Customer: *Scoffs.* “She needs to be measured for a bra? Like anyone is going to appreciate what’s going on down there!”
This is a large store, but our department is small, so both the fitter and the client have heard every word this woman has just said. The client fixes the woman with a hard stare and says in a thick Scottish accent:
Old Scottish Woman: “You’re one to talk! Like anyone’s ginna look at your droopy chebs when ye hiv a face that wid turn a funeral up a side street.”
Customer: *To me.* “Are you going to let your customers be treated like that?!”
Me: “Ma’am, she’s a customer too, and you asked for it.”
Customer: *Angered, turning back to the older woman.* “Your t**s don’t need a bra, they need a hammock!” *Starts storming out.*
Old Scottish Woman: “And win I was your age. I didna need to get mine all propped up like a melon just ta feel good, ya punched lasagna!”
Me: *To the older woman.* “I’m so sorry about her.”
Old Scottish Woman: “Och, don’t worry about it. Her heid is full o’ wee shops, and they are all shut.”
Related:
Never Pick A Fight With An Old Scottish Woman, Part 9
Never Pick A Fight With An Old Scottish Woman, Part 8
Never Pick A Fight With An Old Scottish Woman, Part 7
Never Pick A Fight With An Old Scottish Woman, Part 6
Never Pick A Fight With An Old Scottish Woman, Part 5
