Love Is Literally Blind

(My girlfriend and I are in the bedroom, I’m on the bed and she’s just getting out of the shower. She’s still naked except for a towel wrapped over her hair. I’m distracted by what I’m doing on my phone, but I have my glasses off and I’m very nearsighted. She’s also very bothered by her weight.)

Girlfriend: “Why don’t you ever look at me when I’m naked?”

Me: “I do! I have my glasses off. All I can see is a big, pink blob.”

Girlfriend: “Big… pink… blob…” *glares angrily*

Me: “Um… I’m not getting out of this, am I?”

Girlfriend: “You’re lucky I know you’re blind.”