Needs Some Stupidity Insurance

, , , | Right | September 16, 2018

(I work in a call centre where we handle calls for several different insurance companies — primarily travel insurance — as well as our own in-house policies.)

Me: “Good morning. You’re through to [Company]. My name is [My Name]; how may I help you?”

Customer: “Oh, hey. I’m going backpacking next month and my mum says I need insurance.”

Me: “Okay. We do insurance policies especially for backpacking trips. I just need a few details and I can get you a price.”

Customer: “Okay.”

Me: “First, where are you going on this trip?”

(The customer rattles off lots of different countries, including Europe, America, and even Asia and Africa. It turns out he is travelling for almost a year.)

Me: “Okay, so, you’ll need worldwide coverage, but it covers you for—” *I tell the customer all the things it covers him for* “In order to determine a price, I just need a few more details. Let’s start with your date of birth.”

Customer: “Uh…” *long pause* “MUM! WHEN WAS I BORN?”

(I hear his mother in the background shouting his date of birth, which he then gives to me.)

Me: “Thank you. Now, do you have any pre-existing medical conditions, such as asthma?”

Customer: “Uh…” *another long pause* “MUM! DO I HAVE ANY MEDICAL CONDITIONS?”

(I hear his mother shouting in the background.)

Customer: *talking to his mother* “What? I have diabetes and asthma?”

Mother: *in background* “Why do you think you have an inhaler and an epi-pen?”

Customer: “OH! That’s what those are for!”

(At this point my jaw just drops.)

Customer: “Yeah, so, I have diabetes and asthma. Who knew?”

(I finalise the quote, add in extra medical coverage for his conditions, and he pays. When I hang up, my colleague, who must have overheard the conversation, turns to me and laughs.)

Coworker: “That kid is going to wake up in a bathtub of ice with missing kidneys before the end of his first week abroad.”

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