All We Need Is Some Bloody Tolerance

, , , | Related | September 10, 2017

(I’m a teen girl on my period, and my mom approaches me.)

Mom: “Your dad saw your used tampon in the trash. You need to hide it better.”

Me: “What?! Here I am bleeding, and all he can say is he doesn’t want to look at my tampon in the trash?! What’s he looking for there anyway?!”

(My mom tried to explain that it’s not ladylike, and then I saw my dad pass by, red-faced, having eavesdropped. I chewed him out and he ran away. I didnโ€™t have tolerance for nonsense at that time.)

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  • Kathy Joy

    On the one hand, people shouldn’t be so grossed out by periods but on the other hand, it’s sanitary waste and needs to be wrapped up when put in the bin. I’d say the same for used band-aids and so on. It’s not so much ‘eww icky lady stuff’ but more it’s just basic health an hygiene. If it was wrapped up and your dad found it while rummaging the bin that’s another matter but if you chucked it in there right after pulling it out, that’s gross.

    • Kitty

      It’s in the garbage. Usually, stuff that is in there does not get taken out again, so what does it matter if the bloody stuff is in there? You change the garbage bag and are unlikely to touch it, so who cares?

      • Kathy Joy

        I would say if you had one of those bins with a lid it’s not an issue but basket bins it doesn’t hurt to wrap stuff up. Stuff falls out of bins, bags split, sometimes you do have to reach into the bin and so on.

      • Rob Tonka

        So, regardless of how it looks, all is ok since it won’t be taken out again? So I guess you don’t have a problem if someone does not flush after they drop a deuce.

        Also, if you have any pets, you have to take extra care with how you dispose of that. My dog’s gotten into that kind of thing on more than one occassion

        • Kitty

          Garbage cans don’t have a mechanic to it that makes it automatically clean itself, unlike a toilet that has a flush. And I have yet to have had any cats that showed any interest in the bathroom garbage.
          If I am on my period and have bloody liners, I take ’em outta my undies and roll them up and they may or may not stay in a rolled up form when I throw them into the garbage bag. And when the garbage bag is full, I take it out and throw it away.

        • Dontbeadork

          I had a cat that would fish for the used sanitary supplies. I found that wrapping it up then putting it an old cardboard TP roll core kept him from trying it and made the trash can tidier. You push in the ends and there you go.

          • Rob Tonka

            My wife would have to put the trash can on the toilet tank to keep the dogs from getting into it.

    • Rebecca Charlton

      Wrapping it up doesn’t make it any more sanitary. It’s just wasteful.

      • Kathy Joy

        Most products provide you with packaging you can wrap them up in after. And while it isn’t 100% sanitary, it is more sanitary than leaving them out in the open. That said, this applies mostly to open baskets, since bins with lids negate the need for this though it doesn’t hurt to wrap up anyway since bags split and stuff falls out even if you’re careful. Plus to wrap up a tampon you only need one square of toilet paper, which while is a little wasteful isn’t that wasteful.

        • xXNamirXx

          “one square” my a**

          • Kathy Joy

            Well I’ve always managed with one square but it might be the toilet paper in this country is bigger than where you are. The trick to roll it up from the corner, not the edge.

            Or maybe even the brands I’ve used since I usually buy whatever is on offer and most of what I’ve used manages to fit in one square too.

        • Eavan

          >Most products provide you with packaging you can wrap them up in after.

          That’s not true of tampons. None of the products I’ve used, ranging from Tampax Pearls to convenience-store junk to organic cotton tampons, have had packaging suitable for hiding a used tampon in. And I’m in the OP’s country.

          • Kathy Joy

            That’s why I said ‘most’ not ‘all’. I did manage to find a store brand one where the wrap for the tampon itself (like the plastic packaging) ripped open in such a way that you could, but most tampons don’t.

            EDIT: Since writing this I’ve remembered a good tip I once found for using nappy bags – particularly the biodegradable ones you can buy. This way it’s not wasteful as you would only use it for this for this thing and they break down so they’re better for the environment. That way even if a bag splits or you have to fish through the bin or whatever its fine.

        • Rebecca Charlton

          I fail to see how adding a flimsy layer of toilet paper to a used tampon makes it more sanitary. It just adds to the waste. People are way too squeamish about what comes out of their own bodies. Unless you have some kind of communicable disease, throwing the items in the trash suffices. And if you do, a layer of toilet paper is not enough to contain it. But then, what do I know. I’ve used cloth pads for nearly a decade, washed and dried them, and never had an issue. You just make sure you wash your hands after handling them when they’re soiled.

          • Jami

            Wrapping it up well enough keeps the blood from getting on the trash can which means you don’t have to bleach it out as often.

          • K’Zad Bhat

            Wait, you don’t put a bag in the can to prevent just that from happening?

          • Kathy Joy

            I suppose it depends on whether you live alone or with others. If you live by yourself, dispose of it how you like since you’re the only one who will touch it but when you live with others who all take it in turns to empty the bin, it doesn’t hurt to take extra care.

            EDIT: Just seen Jami’s comment and that’s a good point too that it also means cleaning the bin less.

          • Rebecca Charlton

            No it doesn’t depend on that. Adding a thin layer of toilet paper doesn’t make it any more sanitary. It makes your garbage look prettier, but not more sanitary, and wastes toilet paper besides. If the bag breaks and you have to pick up the contents by hand, does having a thin layer of toilet paper on the menstrual items suddenly mean that you don’t have to wash your hands after picking up trash? No it doesn’t. Meanwhile you’re wasting toilet paper, which is a waste of money and resources. Considering that we’re seeing evidence of climate change barreling down on Florida as we speak we should be more mindful of the things we throw away. The bin argument doesn’t hold much water either – if you’re using bags, which most of us are, you shouldn’t need to clean the bin often anyway, and bleach? Seriously?

          • K’Zad Bhat

            Don’t forget that any fluids can pass through as many as 10 layers of toilet paper, and that fluid carries the germs people are so scared of with it. I say just toss the damn tampon and teach dad not to rummage through the trash.

    • MouseyBrown

      We’ve always had to wrap ours up to keep the dog from going exploring. Same with used bandages, or anything that had any blood.

      Carnivorous animals get a bit exploratory.

  • tater thots

    its in the trash, what else did they expect? are only pretty things allowed in the trash or something?

    • Jazhara7

      With sparkles!

    • 4302

      I don’t know about you but I only ever throw out the prettiest and sparkliest things I own.

      Unfortunately my house is now flooded with garbage but the trash cans are pristine!

    • Kelsey Burleson

      Can’t have dirty garbage.

  • Darian Sabisch

    It does not say she needs to wrap it, it does not say he can see blood. It says she need to “Hide it better,* meaning it is already hidden but not good enough for them. As for not being “ladylike,” maybe someone needs to be reminded that females of that era used old rags shoved in there that where later laundered and reused.

    • WonderRabbit

      Females of what era?

      • Darian Sabisch

        I imagine the Napoleonic wars, but whenever women were actually referred to as “ladies” as a title.

        • Asiyd

          That’s questionable, considering I have been called a lady my entire life down here in Texas ๐Ÿ˜›

          • Darian Sabisch

            As a Title. Instead of Mrs. it would be “Lady Lucas” Not as a complement.

          • An Oni Mouse

            Fair enough, but “ladylike” in this context would relate to “gentlemanly” as a matter of etiquette, rather than to “lordly” as a matter of nobility/title. It is weird how the word carried over from one to the other, isn’t it?

      • Leiko Burningbear

        Perhaps an era before disposable pads were commercially available…which was apparently in 1888.

  • Kitty

    “Mom, I am BLEEDING from my VAG! You really think I give a s*** about being ‘ladylike’ at this point in time!?” Especially since I’m assuming this does not take place back in 1867, when women were supposed to be ladies.

  • Shannon Beranek

    I had a landlord that would actually go through our trash and comment on it. It was super weird and he acted like it was the most normal thing in the world. I determined it was better to “borrow” the neighboring dumpster than to continue with that weirdness.

    • Mechwarrior

      That’s pretty creepy, actually.

    • Kathleen Llama Jones

      I’m pretty sure that’s illegal for him to do…

      • Dante V Wynter

        In the States, no. The courts have basically said, “You threw it out, so you obviously don’t care who sees it.”

        • ittybittyphoenix

          Not everywhere. dumpsters are private property, and many places treat trashcans the same. The idea is, you had to buy the can/dumpster, and you have to pay a service to come on to your property and empty it. Until the people you pay to take it come and take it, that trash is yours since everything involved, you paid for.

          • Darian Sabisch

            So then it would belong to the landlord.

        • Siirenias

          Odd. I was under the opposite impression. It’s to prevent tampering with personal property and stuff. Anyone know where I could look that up?

      • Michael Resnik

        Courts have ruled trash is in the public domain therefore anyone can go through it .

        • K’Zad Bhat

          I can’t say totally for sure, but as far as I know that’s only been applied to when the police go looking, but courts often bend over backward to help the police until the police make it impossible.

          • Brutus

            Courts have ruled that you don’t have a reasonable expectation of privacy in the things that you have set out by the curb.That’s a bit different from ruling that you don’t own it… but there might be a presumption that you think that it’s worthless.

  • Souless night

    That’s kind of sad… women use tampons all the time it’s not that big of a deal

    • Kathleen Llama Jones

      Even just the stigma of buying them amazes me. People buy toilet paper just fine, knowing what it’s going to be covered in, but somehow buying tampons is embarrassing?

      • Katrin Schirmer

        i’m so glad my husband doesn’t have that problem. but then, hes the do what needs to be done type. if i need it, he will get it, without batting an eye.

        edit: it may have something to do with having 3 sisters. who knows. lol

        • June

          My brother once bought me some tampons, because I stayed with him and it surprised me. He ran to the store 10 minutes to closing just to help me. And he has three sisters, too. ๐Ÿ˜€

          • Katrin Schirmer

            perhaps guys who grew up around a bunch of girls are used to it. lol.

          • K’Zad Bhat

            I had no sisters, and though I’ve never had the opportunity, I’d have no problem either. If anyone looks at me weird I might even give an act to make it weirder for them. It’s their own fault if they can’t handle it.

          • Eme Guta

            So there was this internet thing about a lady going to a bachelor’s house and finding pads in the bathroom, and she was like “are these for someone?” And he said they were for any guests that happened to need them. He was hailed as an awesome dude.

          • Kryss LaBryn

            A teen boy was similarly hailed for calling out his fellow students and suggesting they keep a pad in their bags in case a female friend ran into difficulties. There are some guys who get cringy and weird even about clean, unused pads etc! Good lord, it’s not contagious. Calm down.

      • Patrick Mccurry

        Screw that shame. I’m male and had to buy some post rectal fistulotomy surgery. I really hoped some jack-hole would comment on them, just so rather large hairy male me could yell that they were for A**!
        And there are more than a few people that find holding toilet paper embarrassing.

        • Lord Retro

          I’ve only been embarrassed once with toilet paper. I was around 7 or so and my grandparents bought in bulk as they ran a farm, trucking company, auto repair, and tractor restoration, so always had people around. I was lugging one of those monster packs down to the storage room when my uncle (who I could never tell if he was serious or not) made a comment.

          I never even thought about tampons and pads as something to be embarrassed about. My dad and I used to go shopping alone and it was just something that got added to the cart. Never even occurred to me to be embarrassed when we had the cute teen cashier.

          • I work at an auto parts store and IMO it would be much more embarrassing were we to run out of toilet paper for the store. We keep a close eye on the supply inventory.

          • Lord Retro

            This was a family business with a few hired hands. Everyone ate around my grandparents kitchen table and my grandma did all the cooking. My grandparents have 8 kids and all 5 boys are in the family business, and now some of their kids work there.

      • WonderRabbit

        It’s because toilet paper is purchased in bulk, and not necessarily for an immediate need.

        Tampons are like condoms. You’re likely gonna use them soon, and everyone knows EXACTLY where you’re gonna put them.

        • Bonnie Huffington

          o.O Not like they expire if you don’t use them right away. I’d rather have a box around the house than have to run for them after I start up.

          • Angel

            Yeah, I usually stock them up when they are cheap or when I realize i’m running low after my period is over

        • tulip_poplar

          I buy mine in bulk a few times a year. I stash them under the bathroom sink along with the toilet paper. No reason to wait until the last minute.

  • Jackie Fauxe

    Personally, I don’t want to see anyone’s used sanitary products, but I don’t see disposing of them better as being “ladylike” but as simply being polite. I think that old sanitary products are a bit gross–I don’t care to see bloody/crusty Band-Aids either–and I know there are many people who don’t do well with seeing blood, so for the sake of others I think it’s just polite to wrap them up or, at the very least, tuck them deep into a bagged trash.

    It’s hard to tell what happened in this story, though. There’s no indication that the OP didn’t wrap it or hide it, and, if the dad was going through the trash for something, it’s not really fair to chastise the OP.

    • xXNamirXx

      I’m not going to stuff my hand down in the trash bag for your comfort.

      • Jackie Fauxe

        I didn’t mean all the way to the bottom. Personally, I just wrap them and then tuck them down on the side of the bag. I never touch any other trash doing that.

        • TallieFalcon

          I’ve done everything from wrapping them up to sticking in an empty toilet paper tube. I do, however, make sure no blood is visible. I don’t care if the pad/wrapper is visible. No one’s complained at my house. (4 girls, 7 boys including my parents.)

          Edit: I also use cloth pads now cause I can’t stand the thought of putting in a diva cup. I was those just fine, but I also tend to do my own laundry.

          • Jackie Fauxe

            Yeah, it’s the blood that’s important to me. My mom used to not like it if any of the wrappers were visible (and, boy, do the little bits that stick to the wings like to escape the trash), but I’m pretty sure I eventually convinced her that it was no big deal. I don’t think anyone should have to hide clean pads or the wrappers, I just believe it’s polite to hide any blood from (most) others.

          • TallieFalcon

            True about the blood. That’s why I don’t use a diva cup.

          • Jackie Fauxe

            I’m usually fine with my own blood, but I do wonder how I’d handle a diva cup. Not curious enough to try, though.

      • Patrick Mccurry

        Blood stinks, so I wouldn’t just toss it on the top of the trash. But I wouldn’t be caring much about that kind of thing if I were in pain, grumpy, and annoyed by the whole process.
        I can’t even remember what I did with mine back when I needed them.

  • Marion Scheffels

    Sorry, girl, but you *need* to hide/cover/whatever your used tampons.
    I don’t mind about my own used stuff, but seeing other peoples’ tampons, pads or toilet paper is just disgusting – as natural as ever it might be.
    But don’t mind – my mom had to tell me also once when I was young.

    • xXNamirXx

      It was hidden, she was told to do it “better”

    • Liawen

      don’t look in the trash if it bothers you. she doesn’t need to do any more with it than make sure it gets put where all the other trash goes. it’s gross but so is tissues used to blow noses, and no one rants about how those need to be wrapped up in another clean tissue to protect us from that sight.

      • Lauren

        I never understood how a bloody tissue is okay but a bloody napkin isn’t.

  • evandarya

    I started using a reusable menstrual cup about a year ago and I won’t go back to pads or tampons. You can use it for a whole 12 hours, which means not having to change it in the middle of work or school, which saves you time. It is reusable so one cup will last you for years, saving you money. And all the blood goes down the drain, so no one snooping through the trash will bother you about finding your sanitary products.

    • xXNamirXx

      doesn’t work for everyone and they’re disgusting imo. having to empty it in public or having to wash it in public, just asking for an infection. pus there are the times when it suction cups to your cervix.

      • evandarya

        True they don’t work for everyone, but neither do pads or tampons. Pads are the most disgusting to me because it just holds all the blood right up against your body for hours, and tampons give me migraines if I don’t change them exactly on time.
        With the cup I empty and wash it in the morning when I get up and right before bed, I have never had to deal with it while in public. I haven’t had any problem with infection, and it is better for your vaginal health than tampons because it only catches what comes out of your cervix, and doesn’t absorb everything your vagina produces

      • Claire

        That suction cup thing was AGONY. Totally turned me off the whole thing.

        • tulip_poplar

          OMG, that sounds awful. I had considered trying the diva cup, but now…

        • evandarya

          I have heard that that can happen but it hasn’t happened to me. The worst thing that has happened to me is when it shifts during the day and leaks.

    • Rebecca Charlton

      I had a diva cup, and found that when it went in properly it was awesome. Barely felt it, usually only when it was full did I feel it. But about once a cycle I’d bobble inserting and and I’d have the worst cramps for the rest of the day. I switched to cloth pads instead.

      • Moo

        I love cloth pads! Since we do cloth diapers anyway, it’s no extra work for me.

  • Adrian Mckeehan

    This is ridiculous. If the dad doesn’t want to see it perhaps he should buy a trash can with a lid over it. It could be worse, she could be flushing them and clogging the toilet.

    • SwiftyJoe TheOneAndOnly

      when i use tampons i always flush them and never clogged a toilet.

      • PimpKat

        Lucky.

      • Xena

        Me too but I had a cousin that wasn’t allowed to flush them because they had a septic tank.

      • Phil Adler

        You really shouldn’t. They aren’t meant to be flushed.

      • tater thots

        youre not clogging the toilet, but the sewage plant ishaving to do a whole lot more work to get rid of it.

      • Dontbeadork

        So far you haven’t clogged the toilet. Just wait — it’ll happen and it’ll be disgusting for the poor plumber who has to come out and cope with that. Nothing should be flushed but actual bodily waste and toilet paper, which degrades quickly when wet.

      • 4302

        I feel very sorry for whoever’s responsible for the pipes and sewers in your area. You really should stop that habit.

      • Eme Guta

        They used to have massive plumbing problems before toilet paper was invented. It was such a thing that hotels would hire a plumber full time. But thanks for keeping plumbers in business, I guess.

      • Toilets clogging from tampons usually are like time bombs. They don’t clog at the time of the flush but after a few flushes when the tampon is farther in the plumbing in smaller pipes. So you probably have clogged toilets and just don’t know it.

        Edit: also, in urban residential areas, the sewer plumbing is connected, so if you’re not the last on the line, you probably never see the clogs you cause. You probably have a neighbor down the road who has frequent plumbing problems because of you.

      • Fallen

        That’s not good. You may be causing damage to the sewer or personal property. I’m sure your tampon packet says not to flush them. (Mine says it in bold)

        As someone who has a sewer in my house, I and my father have suffered with blocked sewers. We have 3 houses connected to that sewer before it goes to the main one. The risk usually being the sewer being blocked and potentially flooding.

        (When I say in house its accessible from our conservatory)

      • Brutus

        You should take a tour of a black water treatment plant. Take a look at the strainers in the head works, and notice that the only solids left at that point are condoms and tampons.

    • AussieEevee

      Wouldn’t they be effected by the toilet the same way toilet paper is?

      • PimpKat

        Nope, unfortunately not. They take a long time to degrade and can cause plugs everywhere from the toilet to the treatment plant where they’ll have to remove it…

      • Adrian Mckeehan

        Not really no. If tampons were effected the same way as toilet paper I doubt women would use them.

        • tulip_poplar

          Truth.

      • WonderRabbit

        Soak a tampon and atoilet paper roll in a bucket overnight. Compare the differences.

        One is not meant to be flushed.

      • Vulpis

        Nope. Toilet paper is specifically designed to degrade quickly when wet. Compare this to, say, paper towels, which are designed to stay intact (with varying degrees of success) when they absorb water. Tampons wouldn’t do their job very well if they came apart like toilet paper…
        That said, some public restrooms (such as the one at my workplace) have a sign specifically saying not to flush paper towels and other items for just this reason.

  • Claire

    You got about a 50/50 chance your kid is going to menstruate. If you aren’t okay with potentially seeing it occasionally, then don’t have kids or live with anyone with a uterus. Or, idk, get a lid for the gross bathroom trash can.

    • AussieEevee

      The last point needs to be reinforced. Seriously… they cost like… what? 5 bucks at any discount store… and can save so much hassle…

      • Adrian Mckeehan

        one dollar at the 99 cent store near my house.

    • Jenna

      Actually, a 75% chance. (XX , XY parental chromosome contribution)

      And: quite. Absolutely ridiculous given that he’s married (presumably) to someone who was menstrating before and after he got her up the duff!

      • Sora200X

        No, 50% chance is right. One has to come from one side (so an X is guaranteed from the mother) and one has to come from the other (so the father can provide an X or a Y). One parent providing two s3x-defining chromosomes is rare and complicated enough that it’s not really worth breaking it down into minutiae and discussing it here.

      • No, it’s still 50/50. The distribution of x, x, x, y would be 75% if you were only picking one, but you’re picking a pair, and you can’t pair two chromosomes from the same parent. Thus, your options are mom’s x with Dad’s y, mom’s other x with dad’s y, mom’s x with dad’s x, and mom’s other x with dad’s x. Thats a choice from xy, xy, xx, or xx, so you have a 2 out of 4 chance of a girl, or 50%.

      • Anne

        While the chances of a particular fetus being boy or girl are indeed around 50/50, there are other factors at play. Male genes weigh slightly less, so may get to the egg faster. But the first one there isn’t the one that gets to fertilize it. In addition, environmental conditions usually favor female babies being brought to term. So while pure probabilities say 50/50, biology is actually weighted slightly in favor of females in most cases.

        • That would explain why I’ve always heard the actual distribution of male/female in the world is more like 40/60.

      • Tim Van Acolyen

        I would love a world where 75% of the population was female…

        • …so Equestria?

          • Tim Van Acolyen

            human* population. This is why you should always be very clear when expressing wishes :p

    • Vulpis

      Places I’ve worked at have a lidded container in the female restroom, separate from the actual trashcan, for just this purpose.

    • Kitty

      Heck, I don’t understand why you WOULDN’T have a garbage can with a lid in the bathroom. I might understand it in an office, or so, where it is THE designed ‘paper-only’ garbage can, but otherwise…

  • Jami

    I’ll take “you didn’t hide it well enough” over what my mom used to do. If I had to get up and change in the middle of the night and she used the bathroom sometime after me she’d drag me out of bed insisting I take the trash out instead of waiting for daylight claiming “it stinks.” (She and I both have super sensitive noses but it really didn’t smell as bad as she claimed and it wasn’t like she’d smell it from her bedroom.) I hated having to go out at 1 am just to take out a wastebasket that could’ve waited until the sun came up and it was easier to see all the spider webs.

    • 4302

      And here I can’t even get my father to flush the freaking toilet.
      Yiles.

  • Vyrmis

    I don’t care what part of you it came out of, I don’t want to see your bloody anything in the trash.

    • AussieEevee

      I don’t get the “not lady like” thing but… ^ this. I don’t care if it’s a bandage from your arm, or leg, or if it’s a tampon… I don’t want to see it.

      Then again, I usually turn of blood in RPGs when I play computer rpgs because it makes me sick so… *shrug*

      • tater thots

        lol its in the trash guys, gross things belong in there. its pretty gross to see an old banana peel or a diaper, but its put away where its supposed to be

        • WonderRabbit

          Don’t you be putting used diapers in my garbage either!

          • tater thots

            k, i’ll put them under your bed instead

          • Asiyd

            Just curious… where is a used diaper supposed to go, then? XD

        • Anne

          Diapers can be gross. Bananas peels are not gross.

  • Liz Ruifrok

    I always forget how lucky I am that my dad never complained about that. Three daughters, and my aunt and female cousin lived with us for a while. Not a peep about that. He’s awesome.

    • Patrick Mccurry

      While I’m sure he is, not being a douche shouldn’t be where the bar is set.

      • Vulpis

        …Amusing phrasing there. ๐Ÿ˜‰

      • Liz Ruifrok

        Ohh, 100% agreed. But indifference to something like that is overwhelmingly better. And sadly, I know he’s not the norm.

  • That L Chap

    Geez, what is it with the rest of my gender having hang ups about pads and other sanitary products? It’s just blood that comes from an entirely natural process, certainly nothing to complain about. And “unladylike”? Cโ€™mon. That’s ridiculous.

    • AussieEevee

      All bodily secretions get get treated pretty much the same way… and for good reason.

      Her dad wasn’t hung up about the pad. He was hung up about the pad with the bodily fluid on it.

      I can think of at least 4 different types things that are part of the natural bodily process… and I don’t want to see any of them. (3 are liquids, 1 is not… I won’t list them because I don’t know how sensitive the filter is)

      • That L Chap

        I respectfully disagree. To me, that came across as him clearly being hung up about the pad itself. Why else would the mother have said it “wasn’t hidden well enough”?

        Personally, I don’t mind seeing whatever bodily stuff people produce, though I do work as a support worker for disabled adults, so I probably see a lot more of it than most people and therefore don’t mind it. Though I still think people as a collective need to get over their hang ups about periods, especially men.

        • WonderRabbit

          Though I don’t support this explanation, other bodily fluids get flushed.

          The pad uniquely doesn’t, so OP’s dad could be upset about the blood, and want the pad hidden better to, also, hide the blood.

      • Patrick Mccurry

        The mom was being sexist by saying, “unladylike”, while her dad may just be a cowardly hemophobe.
        Menstruating is literally one of the most ladylike things one can do.
        Phobias are outside of our control, but siccing your wife on your own child when she’s in pain just to allay your unreasonable feelings is cowardly.

    • WonderRabbit

      I think a good chunk of your gender doesn’t give a whoopy-patoot about tampons and menstruation, but those guys don’t get stories posted about them here.

      • Ditto

        Had to upvote for “whoopy-patoot”. Am going to have to start using that.

    • cylon_toast

      The unladylike comment is funny, because besides some trans people it’s practically only ladies that menstruate.

  • Sue Wilden

    Dad is right. OP needs to have better manners.

    • tater thots

      for throwing it away? what else was OP supposed to do, eat it?

      • Lauren

        Feed it to the blood demon downstairs? Give it to a vampire? I don’t know.

  • zizania

    I once got chewed out by my Mom for leaving a box of Kotex in the bathroom, because my Dad or my brother might see it. Mind you, this was nearly 50 years ago. I guess things haven’t changed much.

    • cylon_toast

      I would have them moved the box to the kitchen table or something.

    • Kryss LaBryn

      Where the heck else are you gonna keep them?! Do they want you to change them in your room? Should you keep the toilet paper in the bedroom too and only bring it to the bathroom as needed, because, heaven forbid, someone might see the clean, unused product and get squicked out at the thought that someone else in the house is a human being with functioning biological systems?

      Grow the f*** up, dudes, sheesh.

  • Phil Adler

    It’s not ladylike to bleed? Yeah, go tell mother nature that.

  • ValleyLeada

    I always wrap mine in toilet paper before putting them in the trash, just because why would i want my family to see my bloody pads? That’s embarrassing and gross. It’s not that hard to hide them anyway.

    • tater thots

      OP never said if they wrapped it or not (and its sort of a given that they did)

      • ValleyLeada

        Well if that’s the case, I agree that the dad was overreacting. But then that’s creepy because how would he even see it?

        • 4302

          Maybe it was wrapped in the accompanying plastic wrapper. They are less common when you buy tampons but there are tampons that do have them. If so then he would have seen the wrapper and knew what was inside of it.

    • SailorMouth

      Why are you embarrassed that you menstruate? I think it’s sad that you’re so grossed out by your own body.

      • ValleyLeada

        For the same reason I don’t like people hearing me pee. I’m fine saying “I need to pee” or “do you have a tampon?” But no one needs to SEE either of those things.

  • KashyaCharsi

    Wrapping it in something is arguably more sanitary, but come on, dad is big enough to have been enlightened about basic biology. Or is he shocked over and over that your mom doesn’t have a penis?

  • Nyzer

    How do you live with a wife and daughter, yet still get embarrassed around tampons? That’s a teenager’s mentality.

    • AThornAmongRoses

      My grandfather still hates for me to even hint that I have my period, but it’s not like I’m allowed to flat out say it, because my grandmother will start yelling at me for it and saying that it’s not ladylike to talk about it.

      • cylon_toast

        Welp, that’s some old people for you.

        Reminds me of yesterday when my aunt was over. We were in the kitchen where the youngest person was 22 and she still whispered when she said the word pen!s (I don’t know if that word is blocked XD)

        • AThornAmongRoses

          It might be blocked, but then it might not…the filter around here sucks…And my cousins just had a birthday party for their younger daughter, and my male cousin had me inside with him and a friend, trying to make this one speaker system work, and the friend started talking about his ‘bedroom time’ with his wife, and my cousin kept having to remind himself that I’m not the little 16-year-old girl he first met when he started dating my other cousin. Dunno why he has to remind himself at a time like that, when he’s always encouraging me to get a beer out of his fridge whenever I’m at their house ๐Ÿ˜›

          • cylon_toast

            My aunt doesn’t even say the word fart.

  • Michael Resnik

    Then dad shouldn’t look in the trash ! Come on ! What kind of man or father would say this ? It’s just a tampon !

  • Isis Uptown

    G_d forbid a MAN has to see what women go through!

  • NytemareQueen

    My father is 71 years old, and he considers it “self-emasculating” for grown men to be grossed out by periods and tampons

    • Eme Guta

      Can he chew out my gramps? Won’t even walk down the pads/tampons aisle.

    • Kelly Luper

      My stepdad is 66. He is on his second or third wife, and been married to my mom for 27 years. When my little brother was born, I was 12. SD asked if I wanted to go to the store, I said sure! We get there, he gave me a twenty and says ‘your mom needs lady things, I think she said pads. I’ll wait here.’

      That was his third kid. The scene was repeated when the fifth was born a few years later. I was the oldest of the three girls (the youngest of whom is now in college) and mom is still leery of mentioning the weird period. My step mom was a hippy with no body-shame, so puberty was an interesting time for me.

  • loudwhitenoise

    Ah, I remember this one from several years ago. I thought the editors would tag the reposts…

  • Fenn

    If it bothers you that much get a lid for the bathroom trash can! I roll up my pads so they aren’t blatantly obvious but guess what, I’m bleeding for a week, there is going to be several blood soaked pads in the trash

  • cylon_toast

    It’s garbage, garbage goes in the trash. I don’t see a problem.

    • Brutus

      It’s trash, and goes in the trash can. Garbage goes in the compost bin.

      • cylon_toast

        Compost goes in the compost bin. XD At least in my house. Trash and garbage are synonyms to me.

  • You would think a guy would be grateful to have that “red-flag” warning to stay away from the PMS zone.

  • Kay Dougan

    Wonder if Dad didn’t actually care one way or the other, it was just Mom’s way of broaching the subject. My mother said some very similar things when I was a very young teen (although she let Dad off the hook–if he’d said anything, as unlikely as it seems).

  • Percy P. Plushie

    As a male, I can’t even imagine making a comment like that about to or about anyone. I’ve yet to meet a bodily function I’d describe as aesthetically pleasing (some can be worse than others–I can’t stand to be around, let alone produce, vomit), but the parents here are tactless at best. At worst, invasive and rude.

  • Eme Guta

    My mother forced me to use a garbage can with a lid. It made the whole thing smell bad and you pretty much had to take it out to the dumpster as soon as you put a pad in. With an open trashcan, it didn’t smell hardly at all.

    Anyway, we need to erase this terror of periods. It’s a thing that happens! Get over it!

  • Max

    I’d be tempted to just leave the bloody object on the top of the cistern.

    What? Dad doesn’t have to see it in the rubbish any more, it’s all good.

  • Susan McInnis

    Used tampon…not pad. Pad, I understand. I guess I’m old, but really? You couldn’t even give it a wrap of tissue before dropping it in the garbage? Real sanitary. Yup, a bloody tampon you just pulled out of your vagina and dropped in the garbage. I side with Dad. Someone should teach you some manners.