Neck-Breaking Calmness

(When I was a kid, I went out swimming in the river close to my house one day with some friends. At one point, we want to dive into the river head first, but I don’t realise the river is very shallow at that point, so I end up landing on my head, hard. One of my friends is sent to inform my mother, and this is how they choose to do so:)

Kid: *calmly and cheerfully* “Mrs. [Name], I just wanted to let you know [My Name] fell on her head. But you don’t have to worry; the ambulance is already there.”

(My mother never ran so fast in her entire life. I had actually broken my neck, but after several months in the hospital with sandbags on both sides of my head so I couldn’t move it, I made a full recovery, and a year later I even became regional judo-champion!)