Name Blame Game, Part 6

, , , , , | Right | July 6, 2021

My mom’s name is two very common names pushed together. Almost nobody can understand her when she says her name. For this reason, she uses a moniker whenever she orders take-out or makes a reservation at a restaurant.

My dad and I have just arrived at the house when she stops me in the driveway. She says we need to pick up dinner that she and my sister ordered from two takeout restaurants that are right next to each other, and she also needs to stop in the market one more door down. When we park, she goes in one, and I go in the other. She tells me she phoned in the order and it was under her moniker, but she never told me what the order was, nor did I think to ask.

Cashier: “Hello, picking up or placing an order?”

Me: “Picking up.”

Cashier: “Okay, what’s the order?”

Me: “It’s under [Moniker].”

Cashier: *Looking* “[Name #1?].”

Me: “No, [Moniker].”

Cashier: “I have a [Name #2]?”

Me: “No. It should be under [Moniker].”

Cashier: “What was the order?”

Me: “I don’t know. All I know is that it was under [Moniker].”

Cashier: “Well, we don’t take names here. I need to know what the order was.”

If you don’t take names, why did you ask for a name and rattle off two more?

I call my mom’s cell phone. No answer. Finally, I see her driving up to the front of the restaurant, confused as to why my hands are empty.

Mom: “Where’s the food?”

Me: “They don’t have an order under [Moniker].”

Mom: “Oh. Well, I never actually gave them my name.”

Me: *Mental head-desk* “What’s the order?”

Mom: “I don’t know. I think it had something with chicken, lettuce, tomato, and mayonnaise.”

Me: “All right, I’ll go try that.”

I go back inside.

Cashier: “Back?”

Me: “Yep. Sorry about that. She doesn’t remember what she ordered, but she thinks it had chicken, lettuce, tomato, and mayonnaise.”

Cashier: “Right here! Here you go!”

I paid and left, frustrated with both ends of the party.

Related:
Name Blame Game, Part 5
Name Blame Game, Part 4
Name Blame Game, Part 3
Name Blame Game, Part 2
Name Blame Game

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