My Father The Zero

(While I am putting my four-year-old son to bed, the following conversation happens:)

Son: “Mom, I love you. When I grow up, can I marry you?”

Me: “I love you, too, but no, you can’t marry me.”

Son: “Why not?”

Me: “Well, for two reasons. One, sons aren’t allowed to marry their mommies. And two, I’m already married.”

Son: *looking completely surprised* “To who?”

Me: *trying not to laugh* “I’ll give you a hint. You call him Dad.”