My Family And Other Animals, Part 2

(We come home after an evening out, and I notice that the cats have dragged in a lizard. I go to the back yard, where my husband, grown son, and son’s girlfriend are.)

Me: “I need someone to do manly things.”

Son: *dropping the garden hose* “What do you need?”

Me: “There’s a half-eaten lizard in the hallway, son.”

(My son dashes over and pick up the garden hose.)

Son: “Not it!”