My Eyes Are Up Here. LOOK INTO MY EYES!

I’m on a train going to work. At the next station, two people join me in the four-seater: a beautiful young twenty-something woman and a guy around forty or so. She sits next to me, takes off her coat, and dives into a book.

The minute she has her coat off, the guy actually LEANS FORWARD to stare at her breasts. I frown at him. The woman looks up and frowns too. The creepy guy keeps staring. The woman sighs, puts a bookmark in her book, sets it on the table, and SNAPS her fingers in the guy’s face!

Woman: *Very fast, without stuttering once* “Look into my eyes, look into my eyes! The eyes, the eyes, not around the eyes, look into my eyes… Three, two, one…” *Snaps her fingers again* “You’re under. You will not, I repeat not look at my chest again. Boobs do not concern you. You no longer care about boobs! Three, two, one.” *Snaps her fingers again* “You’re back in the room.” 

She then continues to read as if nothing happened. The guy splutters in utter disbelief. He has no idea what’s going on and, being in the Netherlands, probably didn’t even understand her. He tries to get some support out of me

Creepy Guy: *In Dutch* “Can you believe this stupid chick? I didn’t do anything wrong! If anything, I was complimenting her!”

Me: “Computer says no.” 

Because of the ongoing health crisis, I left out the signature cough. The guy got up to sit somewhere else and the woman and I had a nice conversation about our shared Little Britain interest. She was actually Dutch, as well!